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Post by Alicia "Atomic" Kitsune on Apr 20, 2009 15:54:24 GMT -5
Monday Night Warfare 20th April 2009
ACW European Tour: Cardiff, Wales
Schedule of Matches:
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Michael Sant vs. Jin
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Rawt vs. Gary
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Danny Mainer vs. The Senator
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Lee Homicide vs. Jonny Spade
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Dan White, Jake Steele and Hollywood Mach vs. Thunderkiss, Dave Shadow and XS3
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Post by Alicia "Atomic" Kitsune on Apr 20, 2009 15:54:55 GMT -5
Pre-Opening Segment: The Takeover Credit: Road Steelers: Steele/Lee We’re at the final stop of the European Tour before Fallen Heroes, Cardiff, Wales. And besides being known for being the hometown of Dan White, it’s also known for being a city with a various array of people who enjoy various genres of music. One of those genres being Rock N’ Roll. Or more specifically the genre that Demon Inc. represents; Metal. Two days before the final Warfare of April, they are booked at one of the biggest arenas to hit Wales; the International Arena. Due to being associated with Steele, whose father is known to be a part of the music business, he has used his pull to have Demon Inc. open up in a special concert dedicated to the ACW European Tour, and its other festivities. Right near the end of their set, Ken Dante, now the lead of the group shouts at the top of his lungs to a exploding crowd of 7,000 plus, singing their new single “Against Thy Will”. Christine is back in the group, with Punished Fox and Maximus Dungeon add their own flavor to make this tune as amazing as they can.Ken: AGAINST THY WILL! AGAINST THY WILL! Ken extends the mike out into the crowd as they sing along to the tune.Fans: BORN TO DIE AND RAISED TO KILL! Maximus joins in with the fans.Maximus and Fans: AGAINST THY WILL! AGAINST THY WILL! Ken: LOOK IN MY EYES AND SEE WHAT I FEEL!! AS I HOLD YOU… Maximus and Fans: AGAINST THY WILL! AGAINST THY WILL!!! Ken drops to a single knee, holding the mike with both hands as they yells out the final lyrics, the crowd all along with him.Ken: AGAINST! THY! WILL! Ken closes his eyes for a moment, letting the cheers soak in before he stands back and places the microphone back in it’s stand. He talks into it, thanking his fans for supporting them through and through, even with the recent removal of a certain member.Ken: You guys fucking rock, let me say that right now. You continue to support us and rock out to our music no matter what, and we as a group appreciate that. Especially with the recent events that we’ve been through… incase you all weren’t aware, our former lead of the group, Matt Irvine, has been KICKED from the group. The Wales crowd gives off a mixed reaction, the diehard fans behind them but some of the newer fans upset of the removal, yet understanding why it was done.Ken: But… you know Demon Inc. never fails to give the fans just what the fuck they want. So we went out and found a replacement, the perfect replacement for Matt. Without furthermore of the bullshit, Demon Inc. now presents to you… Jake Steele and Lee Homicide! The fan reaction to such an announcement is exactly what you'd expect it to be: unfettered pandemonium. The fans go totally batshit as the lyrically lethal duo of Jake Steele and Lee Homicide finally appear in the flesh. Steele wastes no time in raising the mike to his lips.Steele: Yoyoyoyo! Carrrrrrdif! Fuck’s up!Lee: Cardiff, show some love for yuh homebois about to lay some ownage on that pussy ass bitch, XS3! They react with more explosive cheers.Steele: Haha, a few of ya’ll may not know dis but I got some Welsh blood in me as a matter of fact, so I’m with ya’ll dudes to da death, you dig? But dat ain’t what I’m here for. See, I’m here not only as da new leader of Demon Inc. but I’m also here to send a message to a few dudes who like to run they mouths. Aye yo, it‘s a Takeover!The infamous beat to “Takeover” by Jay-Z drops and the Jay fans in the crowd go straight nuts as Lee takes center stage, this only meaning that he’s about to drop another one of his freestyles. The crowd rocks their heads as Lee hypes the crowd up like only he could do before spitting:CARDIFF, STTTTAAANNNDD UUUUUPPPP!
MATTYYYYYYY!
'Ey, I'ma break yo glass jaw with a serrated hacksaw,
And if you don't believe that I've been with yo girl, here's her rice bra.
You just jealous that ya boy Lee's the nicest,
And that no girl would ride you cuz none of them got a tractor's license.
I know I'm short. Hell, call me a leprechaun,
But that only gives me more luck for a fight I know I've already won!
I'ma break you down, and naw, I ain't no Decepticon,
Cuz I ain't met Optimus Prime or Megatron.
Oh, and yo girl would need more than just a tampon
Cuz I dribbled my ball down there, buried that shot, and won!
I can beat you if I was anyone, even if I was a midget.
I'd kick yo ass even if I was Jiminy Cricket!
I've said it already, but I just can't lose.
You gonna be wearin' sandals when I set fire to yuh shoes!
Cuz I'm tha dragon, bitch,
And you just a faggot bitch,
And you ain't got enough talent to even be a maggot, bitch!
I'ma run through you like fuckin' Hurricane Katrina,
And burn yo pussy ass like you got the gonorrhea!
Then I'ma lay yo dead body on the side of the bleachers,
And pour on hydrochloric acid to eat ya!
I'ma about to serve you, poser, burn you like a purple haze
And give yo ass an early date with the people at the fiery gates!
Just test my words, bitch. Just say I'm lyin'
Cuz when YOU get shot nine times, you won't get rich. You'll die tryin'.
So here, Matty, one chance for ya to get on my side.
Fuck it, I'ma just knock yo ass into the air and let it float like carbon dioxide.
Cuz bitch, I'm about to bubble like peroxide,
And what you did to my homeboi? That shit will not slide.
And you's a snitch, runnin' yo mouth givin' out info.
You should feel lucky that those bullies didn't throw you out the school window!
But I'm not done choppin' ya ass up with my rhymes like razors,
So don't even think that you’re a common denominator.
Bitch, you's a zero! Who are you, the operator?
Everybody know I'm this month's hottest flavor
And that I shoot shots just like Kobe from the Lakers.
Stand up to me, Matty, I choke you out with my chain,
And the only time you get yo dick red is when you piss in the rain.
At Fallen Heroes, you get your final 15 seconds of fame
Cuz Steele's an All-Star but you ain't even playin' the gaaaame.
This is a sure loss for ya, bitch. Just face it.
I can smell yo defeat, and I'm sure you can taste it.
I spit fire in the booth, scorching yo iris,
And I'ma have fun finishin' you with torture devices.
Please tell me how you gonna survive
When I pull the trigger and let go of the nine
Then hide yo body where no livin' soul can find?
I guess now you know why I'm called Lee HOMICIDE!
I do my thing all day, and I've already proven that you are gay.
It's rage against the machine, bitch, and you gon' be my audioslave!
Get it through ya head, boy, I ain't playin' around.
I can leave yo bitch dead just like Foxy Brown.
Don't move, muthafucka. Just stand still.
You so ugly, not even Nelly wanna see yo grill!
Shoot you down, leave your head where your chest is,
Then kick it so hard that it will land in fuckin' Texas!
The fact of the matter is I drop bombs,
And I don't need a fuckin' octagon to stop ya, son
Cuz when I get tired and shit, and I load up the clip,
I got somethin' that will make yo ass REALLY Tokyo Drift! [/center] The beat loops as Steele now takes center stage, his mike in hand as he looks out into the crowd, folding his arms with a smile on his face. Letting Lee be the lyrical mouthpiece for him. He slowly raises the mike to his lips, as he cuts a promo right in the middle of the stage.Steele: Matt Irvine, dis week I takeover your life. I already took your wife. Your band. Your fans. And next is your career. You think I’mma not end yo existence? You better think again. Face it, you got nothin’ to live for nigga. I want you to realize dat. If you ain’t done it already, I want you to take a look in ya mirror. And realize dat behind da words, inside is da same man who first signed his contract to ACW. Da same man who couldn’t stay in ACW for more than six months. Da same man who didn’t win a title until he aligned himself - with ME![/I]... Dat same Canadian blood runs through you, and everything you do ends in da same outcome. No matter how much drive you show, how much you do to get ahead, who you turn to, all in da end everything comes full circle... right back to you being a failure. It will never change. Ever![/color] The crowd is getting more and more behind Steele as he speaks… he takes a breath, and continues...Steele: Seven Days … Fallen Heroes 09’ … Da King Stays On His Throne …Steele abruptly drops his microphone after those last words, and he walks off stage. He could have said more, but quick and to the point, he leaves Lee and Demon Inc. to thank the crowd for coming and to get ready for the next sets. Oh, but don’t think Steele is done talking, Warfare hasn’t even started yet… and it’s going to be… interesting. |
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Post by Alicia "Atomic" Kitsune on Apr 20, 2009 15:55:55 GMT -5
Opening Segment: If You A Scared Motherfucker, Go To Church! Credit: Jake Steele The opening pyros for Warfare shoot off into the air, the Wales crowd exploding with excitement as the camera pans over the entire crowd, catching various signs through it. Such as: “Dan White is my hero”, “Kiss Army Soldier”, and “Steele - THE CHAMP IS HERE SUCKA!”. Each fan getting more excited as their faces are now on television, they almost forgot that a show is about to start. The quick forgetfulness of the crowd is knocked away instantly as the camera focuses on the inside of the ring. Inside, a mini-church is set up, with a black podium set up in the center, a big picture of Jesus looking into heaven near that podium, and seats filling the rest of the ring up, with Demon Inc., Christine Irvine and both Road Steelers occupying them; all in church suits, minus Train and Lee. Watching on, Wales get quiet for a moment trying to figure out why they all are simply just sitting there.
Quickly, their inquiries are brought to light, as to the pleasure of the crowd “Cake” by Lloyd Banks, one of Steele’s well known themes hit’s the PA System and all of Cardiff starts getting extremely rowdy. Within moments Jake Steele and his chick, Misono Matheson step through the curtains, holding hands as Steele has broke from the norm of tonight. Not wearing a church suit of any kind, he and Misono both dawn their street clothes. Steele wearing a leather jacket with a shirt inside, blue jeans, Gucci shades, and of course; his World Heavyweight Championship over his shoulder, for what possibly could be one of the last time before Fallen Heroes. Misono dawns some tight bellbottoms and a white tanktop, a smile on her face as they walk down the aisle and head for the ring. Steele hops up onto the apron, holding the ropes up so Misono can step through. After she enters, Steele enters and raises his World Heavyweight Championship into the air to a massive pop, his World Tag Team Championship around his waist. With his Nation clapping for him, he steps up to the podium and places his World Title on the top of it so it can be seen in full view, it’s glow beaming off through the arena. Steele removes his shades and places them on the neck of his shirt, as he looks out into the crowd, not even have said a word and still having everyone chant his name. He smirks, looking down at the Bible in front of him, clearing his throat as he begins.Steele: I know what you may be thinkin’, why exactly I am out here. With da Road Steelers and Demon Inc. sat in front of me, and me on a podium… Bible in front of me, and everyone in their finest suits. Well, I’ll tell you exactly why we are out here tonight. It’s for a cause. A cause dat not only do all of us believe in, but all of you believe in as well. Da cause to vanquish Matt Irvine from da depths of Alpha Championship Wrestling. To forever rid him from your presence, ACW. Because he says dat he wants to make sure ACW has a champion dat can bring honor and prestige back to da title. Well I look around dis ring and I can easily tell you dat he isn’t needed for dat, because standin’ in front of you right now is da first man to bring honor to dis championship since Fallen Souls! …yeah, I said Fallen Souls! You see, he may have went psycho in da end, but when he won dis championship right here… he… he saw da light! He knew dat he was what ACW needed, in times of Aiden Joseph, and Sarin Rossi, and he knew he could lead ACW to a new dawn, a new age! And a new hope… hmm… he knew what ACW thrived for, but he just wasn’t da man who would deliver us from our dark times.Steele shakes his head almost as if there is sorrow in his heart for Fallen Souls’ short lived Cinderella Story, even though based off of past events that can be argued. He places his hands on his title, as he preaches on.Steele: I… am dat man, who you thrive for, ACW. I am da man who has brought you from da light, and I know every last one of you in dat crowd believes dat I am too. Cause, see, I am not here for a artier motive. I have no desire to destroy da legacy of ACW… I have no desire to take over dis company… and I have no desire to lead you back towards our dark, dark days. Unlike Matt Irvine.Even by mention of his name once again, Wales throws their hatred for XS3 out into the air. Steele nods his head and smiles, knowing his word is getting through to each and everyone of those who listen. He’s a favorite amongst these people, that much is very clear. And Steele wants nothing more for everyone to be taken back by XS3’s every action, which leads to this…Steele: Matt Irvine… XS3... Exemplar. A man dat goes by many names, but truly only has one purpose in life. And no, I am not speakin’ of his failures, I am speakin’ of his betrayals. Believe me when I say I am not da only one he has turned his back on, there have been more…Steele and the rest of his Nation focus their attention to the titantron as a few highlights of Matt Irvine’s betrayals are shown, it starts of course with one of the most infamous ones, his betrayal of Thunderkiss.~November 24th, 2007~
Best. PPV. Ever.[And just like that, Thunderkiss' smile soon fades away unto nothingness. Ken then manages to recover in time to give Thunderkiss a big low blow, causing him to double over. Ken then spins Thunderkiss around and pushes him…] .............. ............. ............ ........... .......... ......... ........ ....... ...... ..... .... ... .. . …right into a Shadow Step from XS3. Thunderkiss hits the canvas hard as Ken then stands up and delivers a huge kick to Seymour's midsection, forcing him to double over as well. Ken then brings up Seymour, who is frantically begging for mercy. Unfortunately, he gets none as Ken dashes over to one side of the ring and sends Seymour out of the ring with a Jackknife powerbomb. Seymour hits the announcer's table and bounces off of it like a rag doll. Ken then turns back to XS3 and accepts a high-five and an embrace from his bandmate. Amazingly enough, the crowd is actually cheering. They're not cheering because Thunderkiss got laid out and they're not cheering because Seymour got what he deserved. They're cheering because they knew they just got swerved and they're respecting the fact that XS3 just chose to reinvent himself thanks to the scheme that occurred all throughout the month. XS3 then stands over Thunderkiss and looks down upon the man who he used to call his friend and simply states these two words: XS3: "Nothing personal."
Thursday Night Meltdown~April 2nd, 2009~
Road Steelers Re-Appreciation NightThe camera gets a glimpse of the seemingly unconscious Train as XS3 then sees Jake using the ropes to get to his feet. XS3 re-enters the ring with a newfound purpose set in his mind.
Jake finally gets back to his full vertical base but doesn't quite face XS3 yet. Jake staggers around, confused as to why this is all coming to an abrupt end. XS3 then sees Jake facing him and he takes a charge at Jake. Needless to say, eight months of good times and friendships go down the drain the moment XS3 hits the Shadow Step. It's almost like time stands still during this moment and as Jake crashes into the canvas, XS3 feels a weight being lifted off of his back, no longer dealing with a burden. Jake is out cold in the middle of the ring and XS3 stands up and surveys the carnage caused by him, the result of emotions and frustration boiling over. Without a hint of sentiment, XS3 turns and finds the prize he really wants:
The ACW World Heavyweight Championship.
XS3 walks over to the belt and picks it up, holding it in his hands. He feels like a kid in a candy store, having found the largest treat of them all. XS3 then places a foot on the fallen Jake and holds the title up with his left arm. Moscow's booing can't be anymore louder as XS3 then lowers his arm and places the belt across Jake's waist before leaving the ring. As he sees his now-former brothers laying beaten and bruised, XS3 walks backwards up the ramp before hitting the stage. Once he reaches the top, he looks on at the fans and finally breaks his stance with a small smirk. XS3 then raises his arms defiantly to them before turning around and leaving the way he came. After all of those clips, we cut back to Jake Steele, who watched on, having to digest that final clip yet once more, swallowing the sickening he feels by just watching. He stares at the black titantron for a few moments, before the lights raise back up and he turns back to his Nation. He takes in a deep breath, before going into full fledged rant mode.Steele: Matt Irvine… is a natural born betrayer. And believe me, if he was to somehow take dis title away from me, he would continue to do da same to all of you out there. Not only you fans, but to everybody in da back who he hasn’t already made a enemy of. He will continue to cut himself off from da world, and he will continue to only embrace himself! His vision is cloudy, but I swear by dis World Title dat I will make him see da light! Oh... let us open our books for a brief passage, from a favorite scripture of mine; Ezekiel 25:17.
"Da path of da righteous man is beset on all sides by da inequities of da selfish and da tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in da name of charity and good will, shepherds da weak through da valley of da darkness. For he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know I am da LORD when I lay my vengeance upon you."
For eight months, I have followed these words. I have read these words every mornin'. I know what these words mean. I live these words... as I am truly da keeper of my brothers. And when my brothers are betrayed, and tainted, I strike down upon those who dare to hurt my family. Fallen Heroes... I will do da one thing I had hoped I never would have to. I will strike down a man I once embraced. And with me will be these men who sit in front of me right now, placed around da ring, standin' in my favor... You could call them my Lumberjacks of War.[/b] Remember these words Matthew... because whatever happens to you, you made me do it... you made my heart want revenge. I once cared man. But now, haha, now... I JUST DON’T GIVE A FUCK! [/color] "Cake" by Lloyd Banks hits and Steele grabs his World Title off the podium, as the rest of the Nation of Demonation stands up and follows him out as he leaves the ring. Misono by his side, and all of his men in tow, now known as the lumberjacks for the World Heavyweight Championship match. Steele reaches into his pocket, and slides his shades back on as some of the Wales fans try to reach over the railing and get a quick touch or five from Steele, but at this moment he's not in the mood to make every last fan happy. He's now focused on leading himself to another successful defense.
....If there was ever a army in ACW to fear, this one is it.
Fade. |
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Post by Alicia "Atomic" Kitsune on Apr 20, 2009 15:57:26 GMT -5
Segment: What the Hell Did I Get Myself Into?, Part 1 (Credit: Lee) Since an early age Lee Homicide, knew that he was special. Not only could he annoy almost every other child on the playground with little to know effort at all, but deep inside him a fire burned. A fire to achieve. A fire to learn. A fire to become the best. A fire to become a professional wrestler. As he grew up, many skeptics and teachers looked down on this dream, and so young Lee locked it away. But it continued to grow and eventually manifested itself into a persona of its own, Lee Homicide. Now that he’s older, Lee is ready to unleash this persona on a completely unsuspecting audience…at Fallen Heroes. Those poor saps will know greatness. They will know awe. They will know his name.itzLEEyuhBITCH [/size][/font][/center] = = = Scene opens. The camera appears to be set up inside the bedroom of a small house. The room is very cluttered. A standing wardrobe has most of its drawers standing wide open, and all of the clothes inside are thrown in without being folded. Several more articles of clothing are thrown about the room. A tiny nightstand is set up next to the bed, with an alarm clock showing “4:59 a.m.” Next is a small twin-sized bed, fitted with flannel Batman sheets. The top blanket covers a large lump in the middle of the bed. Suddenly the alarm clock rolls over to “5:00 a.m.” and a buzzing sound fills the room. A moan is heard as the lump underneath the blanket suddenly twitches. A large arm reaches out from underneath the blanket, and falls onto the top of the alarm clock. It lies there for a few seconds as several moans are heard coming from underneath the blanket. The arm slowly moves back and throws back the sheet to reveal Lee Homicide wearing a sleeping mask over his eyes. After stretching for a few seconds, he lets his left hand fall to the bed. Suddenly a concerned look grows over the portions of his face that we can still see. He begins frantically sweeping over the sheet with both of his hands, until his right hand falls across a smaller bump in the sheets. As a relieved look washes over him, he reaches under the sheet, and pulls out a very worn looking brown teddy bear. He clutches the bear tightly to his chest, rolls over to his side, and begins murmuring to the bear.Lee: We had some pretty bad nightmares last night didn’t we Mr. Poopsie? But I knew I was safe because I knew that you were right here with me. Lee Homicide snuggles in closer with the teddy bear and giggles, but suddenly he completely freezes. With his free left hand, he reaches up to the sleeping mask, and pulls it back and over his head, revealing his eyes, that are now open very wide. He stays motionless for a few moments, just staring into the camera. Suddenly he jerks into a violent stretch, at the top of which he throws the bear as far as he can into the opposite corner of the room. He slowly lets his arms move behind his head and begins moving his legs uncomfortable underneath the sheet.Lee: Hey Guys…um…do you mind giving me a second here? I’m…uh…not quite decent yet. Do you mind giving me just a sec? The camera slowly moves backwards and out of the room. As soon as it is fully out of the threshold, the door to the bedroom is slowly closed, and a lock is heard clicking. A voice is heard whispering on the other side of the door.Lee: I’m so sorry Mr. Poopsie, I hope I didn’t hurt you… As the voice trails off, the scene slowly fades to black.= = = When it fades back in “5:30 a.m.” appears on the bottom of the screen. The door to the bedroom slowly opens and Lee Homicide emerges wearing a black sweat suit and stocking cap. He slowly makes his way over to the refrigerator, opens it, and pulls out a carton of eggs. He sets them on the table, and takes out a glass from the cabinet above his head. He cracks open three of the eggs and lets them slide into the glass. He picks up the glass several times, but almost immediately sets it back down on the counter. Lee Homicide begins to stare at the glass.Lee: Come on now Lee! If you want to be the next great ACW superstar you’re going to have to make sacrifices like this to get into shape! Especially if you ever hope to be a champion. He pinches his nose with one hand, and brings the glass up to his lips with the other. After closing his eyes, he begins to drink the eggs. But after only a few drops touch his lips, he spits them all over the room.Lee: OH! THAT IS NASTY! Lee Homicide leans up against the counter for a few seconds, before getting a thoughtful look on his face.Lee: I’ve got it! He pulls open the cabinet again and removes a bowl. He then walks over to the refrigerator and pulls out a gallon of milk and removes a cereal box from the pantry. As he begins to poor it, the camera makes out the word “Wheaties” across the top. Lee Homicide suddenly looks at the camera with a guilty look on his face.Lee: What? It is the breakfast of champions after all! After grabbing a spoon, Lee Homicide makes his way over to the kitchen table and sits down. He stares at a remote control sitting next to him for a few seconds.Lee: A little T.V. can’t hurt can it? After all I’ve been on it enough. He grabs the remote.Lee: OK, OK I’ll only watch for fifteen minutes over breakfast and then I’ll start my exercise routine. He flips on the remote to see AM ACW playing on the TV. He can hear Jake Steele’s voice as the camera zooms in on the screen. Suddenly we hear a loud thunk. The camera turns around to reveal Lee Homicide lying with his face sideways in the milk. He is already beginning to snore as the scene fades to black. As it fades back in “10:00 AM” is shown across the bottom of the screen. Lee Homicide is still sleeping. He begins to slowly speak in his sleep.Lee: Oh Ms. Kitsune, you are a naughty girl aren’t you? The scene once again fades out. When the scene comes back up the camera has moved to the outdoors as the word “Noon” is shown across the bottom of the screen. Lee Homicide is shown, still facedown in his cereal. Suddenly he sits up with a jolt.Lee: Mr. Poopsie? Lee Homicide coughs and begins to awkwardly look around the room. He looks down at his hand which has just hit the latest edition of the T.V. guide. He picks it up, and looks at the page.Lee: “ACW presents Fallen Heroes!” Ha, funny page to turn to! He begins to awkwardly shovel cereal into his mouth and he reads on.Lee: The winner gets a free chance to challenge for the World Title at Omega Effect…WAIT A SECOND! He throws down the paper and begins pacing around the room.Lee: This is it Lee, finally your opportunity to show that you’re not just someone who wasted away your life on cable television obscurity. You can’t just sit around here for the rest of the day! This is finally you’re chance to be someone in wrestling! Finally a chance not to be just a hood ornament on the hoods of those quickly raging to the top, but Lee Homicide, a CHAMPION! He gazes off in a daydreaming manner for a few seconds before an awkward grin grows over his face. He picks up the rest of his cereal and quickly downs it.Lee: Now to get some serious wrestling work in to show just how much I want that belt. Lee Homicide awkwardly begins to run towards the front door, but just as quickly as he’s started, he trips over a pair of shoes.Lee: Oh…BALLS! He lands face first on the floor and remains there for a few seconds.Lee: I’ll definitely have to edit that one out! The scene fades to black. |
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Post by Alicia "Atomic" Kitsune on Apr 20, 2009 16:05:30 GMT -5
”Tokyo Agogo Take 2: The Hangover”
Credit: Danny Mainer] ”Oh dear God, it hurts to even move right now” groans Danny as he slowly tries to kick some life into his muscles. He slowly cracks his eyes open and the blazing Minato sun acts like laser surgery for his eyes. He immediately snaps them shut as his Blackberry rings blazingly loud. Danny tries to move to get it but lying on top of his arm is a scantily clad Japanese girl who he has never met and from examining the evidence hasn’t had sex with but has slept with. Danny with a forceful shove pushes the unnamed girl off of his arm and reaches for the phone to see that it is in fact not an alarm which he thought he’d set but an incoming call instead from Raymond King. An image of Ray with his stomach out and a huge face painted onto it shows up as his profile pic and Danny flips the phone to his ear somewhat still disorientated.Danny Mainer: ”Hello?”Raymond King: ”Hello indeed buddy! Hahaha! Well done for hitting it off with Hiroko so well last night. She looked like a great fucker and that’s just from her dancing. She awake?”Danny Mainer: ”Hiroko? Who the fu-.”He glances at the still asleep girl lying next to him blissfully unaware of the conversation going on right above her head. Danny sighs and rests along the backboard of the bed.Danny Mainer: ”I didn’t fuck her. She’s still wearing her lingerie and there’s no mess. I don’t even think we made out. I think I just passed out and she lied down on top of me. I feel violated.”Raymond King: ”Just be glad you told that psychotic fan of yours to leave when she did. She was trying to grab your dong so much it was unbelievable. She kept offering you bottles and… jeez, wow. It sure was a party.”Danny Mainer: ”What, Kimiko? She’s like, fourteen years old.”Raymond King: ”I know. Takeshi and I went for a wander and I met his parents, they seemed like a nice enough couple. Anyways, they showed me her room and jesus. You may be the psycho butcher but you’d be freaked out by the shit you saw in there. Kid’s a fuckin’ psychopath. For real. She’s totally obsessed with you, she even has posters of me in there and I didn’t know there were any even produced. She had A DARTBOARD with Mei-Feng’s face plastered on it. It gets so much worse but I don’t wanna spoil the surprise for you.”Danny Mainer: ”So when is Amelia flying over to Japan?”Raymond King: ”She’s not. That’s one of the reasons I called you. She’s staying in America so she can attend lectures and do her art degree… and shit. That sounds pretty rational to be honest but man, well, while the cat is away the mice will play and Japan is full of the hottest girls on the planet. You should get out there, get introduced to and sucked off by a lady-boy. I know you’d enjoy that shit.”Danny Mainer: ”Fuck you Ray.”Ray chuckles down the phone and ignores the command of Mainer instead continuing with his own point.Raymond King: ”This country is great though Danny. I mean I’d heard good things but this country is balls to the wall awesome. I mean even I got action last night, after the party had wound down me and Takeshi went to this little bar on the corner of the pier. They didn’t care we were plastered, we went in and left with these two random girls there one of which was actually from England and well unlike you I actually got some fanny. Celebrity status gets you fucked man, you’ll know that better then most. It was brilliant, she was this blonde with the nicest arse ever. Anyways, I’d like to ramble on but I’ve got shit to do.”Danny Mainer: ”Where’s Takeshi?”Raymond King: ”Oh he’s not far away, he found me about three hours ago lying next to one of the dumpsters with a cigar in my mouth grumbling that I was a millionaire as I held onto a bottle of whisky. Minato is great, all the back-alleys for getting trashed in. Takeshi is behind me right now throwing up his intestines because he realized that this girl he screwed last night was one of his old enemies in high school and plus he tried hair of the dog which is never a good thing. Laughing at the toilet pretty damn loud aren’t ya Takeshi? You poor arse motherfucker. That’ll teach you.”Ray chuckles sadistically at his suffering while Danny shivers a little disturbed at what he’s being forced to listen to. Ever so faintly in the background he can hear the wretching and the spluttering the young Takeshi Hata is making into a Japanese toilet.Raymond King: ”Anyways, another thing I want to talk to you about is the possibility of some of the Yakuza coming to your apartment tonight. If you clean the place up and maybe hire a hot maid/host to help make the place look nice you’ll be able to get into the good leagues with those guys. They help build the place and then you give ‘em a small cut for protecting it. Influential boys I’ve got you in with here love doctor, I’m gonna’ go now and get some toffo’s but just don’t show them your Relentless mini-fridge. They’ll want some.”Danny Mainer: ”Alright thanks. Later dude, I’m off to go wake up.”Raymond King: ”Oh and whatever they say, DON’T snort wasabi. Your face will explode.”Danny mutters something under his breath about no good communists and then hangs up rolling back over to go to sleep as the screen turns to black. Tokyo is fun, Dan mutters again before cuddling up next to Hiroko.FADE |
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Post by Alicia "Atomic" Kitsune on Apr 20, 2009 16:06:13 GMT -5
Segment: Trainicon '09 (Credit: Train)
We open at the San Diego Convention center in San Diego, California. The parking lot is empty except for what looks like the Trainmobile parked in a handicap spot with a ticket on the windshield. However, one more car pulls up and two men step out. They look confused but proceed into the building anyway. Meanwhile, inside the building, Bat Train sits at a table filled with Bat Train collectibles such as action figures, mugs, napkins, plates, t-shirts, sweatshirts, necklaces, official video games, posters, etc. Bat Train waits without a single "fan" in site. Suddenly, a man appears behind him and Train jumps, its Thunder Lawyer.
Thunder Lawyer: What is wrong with you.
Bat Train: AH YES! MY FIRST FAN!
Thunder Lawyer: Dammit Train, how much did this all cost you?
Bat Train: $450,000
Thunder Lawyer: Well....I guess you can make that up...
Bat Train: Per hour renting this place.
Thunder Lawyer: FFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUU How many people have shown up?
Bat Train: Well, including you, one!
Thunder Lawyer: ......Train, you are going to go bankrupt.
Bat Train: Never, once people actually see how great Bat Train is, this will be the biggest hit ever.
Thunder Lawyer: Train, nobody knows about this Trainicon 2009 deal.
Bat Train: Yes, I posted fliers all around the world!
Thunder Lawyer: No you didn't Train. Stop saying that you did, nobody is going to show up here-
Suddenly, two men open up the doors and step into the huge area with nothing except Train and Thunder Lawyer. One of the men looks to be in his early 30s, wearing a baseball cap that's green. The other...well lets just say he has a face for radio.
Man 1: Is this comic-con 09?
Bat Train: No...
Man 2: Are you sure? >.>
Bat Train: YES I'M SURE! But can I interest you in some Bat Train merchandise?
Man 1: No....
Bat Train: Fine! Can you tell me your names so I can sign this.
Man 1: MY NAME IS KEN!
Bat Train: Last name?
Ken: NEVER! ITS PERSONAL! I DON'T WANT YOU LOOKING ME UP ON THE INTERNET!
Bat Train: K....And whats your name?
Man 2: Chris...Savic......heinzermeizersz.....
Bat Train: Alright! Here are your T-Shirts. That will be $1000 a piece.
Ken: I'm not paying for that! I gotta spend my money on things that aren't Resident Evil 5!
Chris: I MARK FOR FALLEN SOULS!
Ken: THUNDERKISS RULES! YEAH DOUBLE PENETRATION! HIGH FIVE!
The two high five. Thunder Lawyer turns his head to the left. Bat Train gets mad.
Bat Train: What is wrong with you two?
Ken: I like hanging out with kids that are half my age! It's fun! I lure them in with my interest in video games when I don't actually like that shit. Then I rape their brothers named Nick.
Chris: I play Vega in Street Fighter 4 >.>
Bat Train: I'll tell you what, if you guys start promoting Bat Train by telling all your friends, then I'll give you a discount on all Bat Train things!
Ken: Hmmm....I think I'll do it! I like having a fad for a month and then switching it again and again. Then I send my child friends links of things that happened like 20 years ago and say "Brother, back in my day, this was Awesome, nowadays, this is gay."
Chris: Riiiight. I'll play Bat Train's theme song at the request of said children on my radio show!
Bat Train: YEAH!
Ken: And then, I'm not going to buy Resident Evil 5! However, I'll buy my friend a stick then wait a week to send it to him! Oh and I can't send it to his house because his brother thinks I'm gonna rape him.
Chris: I'm from Canada.
Bat Train: Enough said.
Thunder Lawyer: So, you want two guys who you don't even know and you can't rely on, promote your stupid alternate identity?
Bat Train: Yes. What's wrong with that?
Thunder Lawyer: Sometimes I wonder-- No, everyday I wonder why I am your lawyer. You are going to spend so much money on this, you are going to have nothing except a latex suit.
Bat Train: You just don't believe. And non believers will be shunned.
Chris: Shuuuuuuun.
Ken: Shuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuun.
Thunder Lawyer: That was probably the scariest thing I've ever seen in my life. I'm gonna go home now.
Bat Train: WHO NEEDS YOU?
Thunder Lawyer Leaves and Train turns back to his two new Bat Train followers. Really, it doesn't make sense on how they agreed to this and this whole segment was just a big shot to Thunderkiss and FSX. However, they will end up building up Bat Train O Mania and you will see the movie with The Toker played by CP himself.
End.
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Post by Alicia "Atomic" Kitsune on Apr 20, 2009 16:06:44 GMT -5
Match 1: Michael Sant vs. Jin (Credit: XS3)
The match started off with Sant showcasing exactly what he can do in the ring. Jin was taken down relatively easily after Sant utilized a scoop slam with some elbow drops to boot. The fans were digging the show being put on by Sant, who later broke the back of Jin (not literally fools!) with a backbreaker then followed up with a knee drop. Jin did make a comeback after fighting out of a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker but he failed to follow through on it as Sant later connected with the tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. After a fallaway slam and a Stinger Splash in the corner, Jin was picked up and locked into the Clutch of Revolution. During this, Jin went to spit out his rainbow mist but wound up almost choking on it. Not wanting to risk asphyxiation, Jin wisely tapped out to give Sant his debut victory.
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Post by Alicia "Atomic" Kitsune on Apr 20, 2009 16:07:55 GMT -5
Segment: Dodecka bobeeka shinaukah rickonda nikeetah pikautah chiquata banana dodecka bobeeka shinaukah rickonda nikeetah pikau chi chi boe. (Credit: XS3) The fans in the arena are all ecstatic to have ACW come to Cardiff, Wales. It's a suitable reaction, isn't it? To finally have hometown heroes such as Dan White and his Empire cohorts come to grace them with their presence. But on the opposite side of the spectrum, not all is well with one man's world. And we are about to find that out soon enough. The fans turn their attention to the lights cutting out and the Alphatron lighting up to reveal a large image of a swirl. Coupled with the intro of Queen's "Stone Cold Crazy", the fans are wondering what's up before we cut to a shot of a hotel room, with clothes, papers and bed sheets strewn all around. XS3 suddenly lurches into the picture, with the Cardiff crowd booing him. He has a pair of jeans and a hoody with the hood raised.XS3: So is this all funny? Go ahead, laugh. HA. HAHAHA. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. My misfortunes have all become the laughter to compensate for what little of shallow lives you all claim to have. CONTINUE TO MOCK ME, O EVIL ONES! BWAHAHAHAHA! TASTE MY LIGHTNING FUCKERS! So maybe after all this time, you expected me to do some incredibly stupid shit liiiiiiiiiiiike I dunno, jumping off a bridge. I didn't. I'm still alive so put that in your French toast and feed it to your cat.XS3 grits his teeth with a sick smile before throwing up his hood, revealing himself to be completely normal looking, apart from the bags under his eyes.XS3: Well, what I did waaaaaaaas… nothing of interest to my facial hair or any hair. I trimmed my beard but that's it. I like my hair the way it is and my eyebrows too cause I like my eyebrows and people take them for granted so they're mine. And you can't have them.Cut to a shot of XS3 with wide eyes and a happy smile.XS3:  …………………  XS3 then reappears, looking more frenetic than normal.XS3: You're probably why I'm dangerously teetering on the verge on insanity. Well, I'll tell you why. My wife is gone, my bandmates are gone, my mask is gone, my father thinks I'm clinically insane and wants to put me in counseling, I haven't slept for a week and fuck yes, I'm craving a cigarette. God when was the last time I smoked? Probably like eleven-bazillion years ago; I don't know. None of you assholes give a shit about my life.The next shot we see is XS3 sitting at a table with a Burger King Whopper (three of them to be exact), a large order of fries and a large Coke.XS3: Hey kids, want to look just like me? It's called cigarettes, booze and Burger King, you fucking inbred shitstains.XS3 then turns and grabs his Whopper, stuffing it into his mouth and ripping it apart like a wolf. We then return to a shot of XS3 standing in front of the camera, adopting his frantic pace and look.XS3: All right, now let's discuss what the REAL relationship between the fans and I is truly all aboot. "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA OH MY FUCKING GOD HE SAID ABOOT NOW THAT'S A TRUE CANADIAN." No. Here's the real correlation. I am the product advertised to the masses as a dirty, rotten liar that is going against a thieving hero and you are the consumers that will buy into anything that has flashing bright lights, abs so firm that you can great cheese off of them and of course a cool slogan.The next cut is of XS3, stripped down to his boxers and rocking uncomfortably in the fetal position with his eyes closed.XS3: UNFORGIVABLE UNFORGIVABLE UNFORGIVABLE UNFORGIVABLE UNFORGIVABLE UNFORGIVABLE UNFORGIVABLE UNFORGIVABLE UNFORGIVABLE UNFORGIVABLE UNFORGIVABLE UNFORGIVABLE UNFORGIVABLE UNFORGIVABLE UNFORGIVABLE UNFORGIVABLE UNFORGIVABLE UNFORGIVABLE UNFORGIVABLEWe return to the previous shot of XS3 fully dressed and looking pissed off as he has been this whole segment.XS3: I produce, you consume. I produce, you consume. I produce, you consume. That's it. That's all there is to it.A camera angle change occurs as XS3 looks down, almost at his genitals.XS3: Nothing more can be said about our fucked up relationship.The camera angle changes as XS3 points threateningly at the camera.XS3: And if you EVER set foot outside those boundaries, I'm going to shave my initials into your pet horse.A picture of a horse is displayed with a comical "neighing" noise thrown in for humorous effect. We return to XS3 and as far as the fans can tell, all hope appears to be gone for XS3's sanity.XS3: Some people have the nerve, THE FUCKING NERVE, to ask "Hey Matt, what you gonna do on April 20?" In case you've forgotten, April 20 is 4/20, which means Weed Smoking Day. You know what I'm going to do on 4/20? I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to wake up in this fucking sleazy hotel room, I'm going to take a shit and then I'm going to laugh at all of you retards who have nothing better to do than get addicted to the most un-addictive drug in the fucking universe. And I know un-addictive isn't a word because I FUCKING MADE IT UP. And then I plan on waltzing down to the Cardiff International Arena and kicking the shit out of whomever I'm up against. I don't know. They forget me so many times, it's unbelievable. Like, I've had like two matches since Genocide and it was against Rattlesnake and Train. And I fucking won cause I'm awesome. And they didn't cause they suck.XS3 then reappears, holding the camera as he scoots his ass along the floor like a dog. Once again, he is shown in his boxers.XS3: My ass itches. And Rody Walker is going to sue the fucking shit out of me for stealing his video.By now, the fans are either heading to the bathroom, heading to get a hotdog or already starting to phone nearby psychiatric hospitals, trying to get one Matthew Keith Irvine in on the waiting list. The next cut is of XS3 attempting to hold a shotglass in his eye as he marches in one place.XS3: OY 'ALLO GOYS!!!! OM WINSTON CHURCH 'ILL!!!! OM 'ERE TA HALF SUM TAY AND CRUMPETS WALL AH SIT ON ME ROYAL FANNAY AND LISTEN TA JAKE STEELE RAMBLE ON ABOUT DA GUBBERNMENT!!!!The shotglass falls out of XS3's eye and onto the floor, causing XS3 to slip and fall harshly on the back of his head. His groans are audible as he reaches up to stop the camera. The final shot of the segment is of XS3, once again in his boxers and a necktie tied around his forehead as a bandana. He begins to strut with a fanatical look in his eyes.XS3: WOOOOOOOOO! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! WOO! WOO! WOO!He looks down and beams with insanity before taking the shotglass from earlier and busting it off of his forehead. Glass shatters everywhere as we now see a gash across XS3's forehead. Blood streams down his forehead but at this point, it's the least of XS3's worries.XS3: LOOK WHAT I'M DOING ACW! I'M BLEEDING LIKE ANNA SOMMERS-JOSEPH ONCE A MONTH! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!Finally, XS3 begins to laugh like a madman, having been weaned off of his crack-cocaine. Just before he can continue, he falls backwards, landing on the bed with a soft but mighty thud. The video then ends with static and the fans sigh, relieved at the fact that the promo is over. But as they resume preparing themselves for a rowdy ol' show, they can't help but question XS3's current state of mind and how he will prepare himself for Fallen Heroes.
Fade. |
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Post by Alicia "Atomic" Kitsune on Apr 20, 2009 16:08:51 GMT -5
“QUANTUM OF SOL-ASS” [/font] Credit: Hollywood Mach, Thunderkiss[/center] [To hell with fisticuffs when there are other forms to competition to be had! Of course, I am speaking of round two of the “Showtime Invitational Entertainment Tournament” which is now underway in the arena parking lot. The joint venture between ACW and MGM has spared no expense as a massive structure looms in the background of the current camera shot. While that would normally be enough to garner the attention of our AD/HD generation, it is what stands in front of it that captivates the audience. None other than “M” herself, Judi Dench, has graced us with her presence here tonight though it was anything but willing. Just like her colleague, Daniel Craig, she shows much dismay to be here and these feelings only increase when she realizes TK is ogling her with her eyes.] Thunderkiss: Hey, I’d still hit it.Judi Dench: Well Gentlemen, its now your time to shine once more. And when I say shine, I mean act like complete idiots. It’s still beyond me why MGM would want either one of you, but hey, as long as they keep sending me a check why should I care? On second thought, I’ve had a change of heart and I will gladly tell you why. Not only would your involvement be soiling my name for future roles, it would degrade an ageless, iconic property. Hollywood Mach: Sistah be testing my patience!Thunderkiss: Boy, did you just say a mouthful.Judi Dench: *AHEM* May we please continue? The quicker we get this done with, the better. Thanks to contractual obligations I have to be here tonight, otherwise, believe me, I’d never associate myself with any of this. Gentlemen, tonight you will be partaking in a contest that will require the use of all your senses and then some. Behind me lies a maze, a maze full of traps, dead ends, puzzles and most importantly, a Bond Girl. Thunderkiss: Wait? Did you say there are some wimmanz in there?!Judi Dench: Yes, you heard me correctly. The first man to find the hidden Bond Girl and escort her to the exit shall win this round. Simple enough directions but I wouldn’t put it past either of you meatheads to be confused. Must I repeat myself? *silence* Well then, gentlemen, take your positions. [TK and Macho rush toward the starting line, each man elbowing and tripping the other as if they were back in junior high. After a little coaxing by tonight’s judge and the camera crew, they tone down their antics long enough for each man to properly get into position. Wishing nothing more than to point the starting gun at either man’s head, Dench shows nothing but resolve as she points it upwards instead. Cue Europe, It’s the final countdown.] Judi Dench: On your marks. Get set. Go! ~!~BANG~!~ Thunderkiss: *Sniff, Sniff* Vagina dead ahead![/color] Thunderkiss: Quit your bitchin’. You can’t say that finishing last in this race doesn’t have its benefits.Hollywood Mach: You're a cheat KISS...a DIRTY JEMIMA CHEAT![/color] Thunderkiss: Benefits Macho...BENEFITS.[TK reaches up with his free hand and smacks the Bond Girl on the ass to prove his point. Almost instantaneously she lets out a shriek of displeasure and begins to question if her salary tonight is truly worth it. Luckily for her, her ride has finally come to an end as Thunderkiss’ body breaks the finish line. With his wedding ceremony yet to come and a smoking hot babe on his shoulder, could life possibly get any better? Why yes, yes it can and good ol’ Judy is going to tell him how.] Judi Dench: It has been determined that though Thunderkiss avoided most of the entire maze by, how shall we say, “making his own path,” his actions have been deemed to be perfectly legal. Part of being a villain in the Bond universe is being able to manipulate your environment to achieve success and to obtain it using any means possible. In the end, the ends justified the means for him and therefore I declare him the winner. God save us all. And I thought Vin Diesel was a pain to work with... [Dench walks away with her head lowered in shame. The second she returns to her hotel a nice warm shower will be had to wash TK’s sleaziness off of her. If it were up to Thunderkiss she could hang around and allow Macho’s tears to do it for her (or so he would have you believe). And what about Macho? At the moment he is also walking away, head lowered, but not out of shame, but out of disappointment. He had his shot to close it out tonight but failed to do so. Just like Wilcox predicted, both men have gone full circle and rely on Fallen Heroes to decide their fates. To the victor goes the spoils.] Hollywood Mach: At Fallen Heroes, Teeks...I'm goin' all the way to the top....Yeaah.[/color][/i] ---
SHOWTIME INVITATIONAL ENTERTAINMENT TOURNAMENT
CURRENT STANDINGS:
THUNDERKISS: 1
HOLLYWOOD MACH: 1
--- [FADE] |
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Post by Alicia "Atomic" Kitsune on Apr 20, 2009 16:11:08 GMT -5
Segment: Cappucino, baby. (Credit: Rawt)
Rawt began his long walk back from the coffee stand with his french vanilla cappuccino in his hand, to the locker area. As he swung open the door, he noticed that Charlotte King, was standing next to his locker.
Charlotte: Hello, Rawt.
Rawt: Hello...Charlotte.
Charlotte: Big night tonight isn't it? Lots of people out there.
Rawt: Yeah...should be a good show.
Rawt moves over to the bench and starts sipping his cappuccino.
Rawt: You gonna stay and watch the fight?
Charlotte: I've got interviews to conduct, Mr. Ross!
Rawt gives Charlotte a smile, then has another sip of his french vanilla.
Charlotte: So...you better get out there! You don't want to lose by default!
Rawt: I know, I know.
Charlotte: Don't you think that by drinking that cappucino right before your fight, you are jeopardizing your chances of winning? What if you vomit?
Rawt: Don't worry, I'll be fine. So far, I am liking my return to ACW, good competition, easy opponents - hell even the World Champion couldn't take me!
Charlotte: Well thats good you're liking it!
"Another one bites the dust" by Queen hits the arena.
Rawt: Well I guess it's time. Come on out with me - bring that mic, I've got a thing or two to say!
Rawt gets up and walks down the ramp, and towards the stage, Charlotte King following from behind. Rawt jumps over the ropes, and helps Miss King in. Rawt starts doing "the wave" towards the crowd as they scream his name. Several ladies in the front pass out from exposure to Rawt's sensually explosive sideburns at close range. Charlotte passes Rawt a microphone.
Rawt: Ladies and Gentleman, children of all ages. Tonight, on this very stage, your crowd favorite, Gary, shall lose to my relentless power - making my winning streak EIGHT TO ZERO!
Charlotte: What are your plans for the future Rawt? Fallen Heroes? What about Omega Effect?
Rawt: Fact of the matter is that I do not really care if I win Fallen Heroes - that glory should go to my undisputed leader: Hollywood Mach! It is his turn to rise to the top once again! I will do everything in my power to assure he wins that match! As for Omega Effect - lets just say I don't plan on losing that night - no matter who I face!
Rawt tosses the mic back to Charlotte and nods at her before she leaves the ring.
The match - IS NEXT!
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Post by Alicia "Atomic" Kitsune on Apr 20, 2009 16:14:30 GMT -5
Match 2: Rawt vs. Gary (Credit: Rawt) Bell Rings. Gary in this time has made his way into the ring and the match begins! Rawt lays into the poor lad with many a knife edge chop before getting him into the corner. Rawt continues to lay knife edge chops into the much smaller Gary and it isn't long before the poor lad's chest begins to turn red. Rawt irish whips Gary to the other corner of the ring and runs at him for a splash into the turnbuckle. Gary takes the move full force and crumples to the mat. Rawt picks up Gary and grabs hold of him - beginning his repeating headbutt technique. SLAM! SLAM! SLAM! SLAM! SLAM! SLAM! SLAM! SLAM! SLAM! SLAM! Rawt tosses the fallen Gary to the ground and referee Joey Reynolds looks on in astonishment. Rawt paces around the ring, rubbing his bald head as Gary lies on the mat lifeless. Rawt decides to go in and do some more damage to Gary but Joey holds him back and calls for the bell. WARFARE WINNER: RAWT VIA TECHNICAL KNOCKOUT |
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Post by Alicia "Atomic" Kitsune on Apr 20, 2009 16:14:59 GMT -5
Segment: The referee! (Credit: XS3/Senator)
Once again, our attention is shifted to the backstage area. A surprising face appears on the camera; it's the face of Lauren Terry, the niece of XS3. As she walks down the halls, she looks around as if she were trying to find someone close to her. Sure enough, Lauren does find someone but it isn't whom she intended to find. She accidentally bumps into an instantly recognizable face from ACW; it's Senator Steve Phillips, who is on his way to contend with Danny Mainer later on.
Lauren: Oh! Sorry!
Senator regains his composure and smiles at Lauren.
Senator: It is quite all right, I was a little hurried to get to the locker room of one Mr. Matt Irvine.
Lauren: Hey! He's my uncle! I'm his niece Lauren! And you're…
Lauren takes a small amount of time before she gasps and smiles upon recognizing the face of a true legend.
Lauren: Senator Steve Phillips! I'm so honored to meet you!
Her only impulse is to extend her hand in an act of respect. Senator heartily accepts the handshake and smiles upon seeing her eyes that shimmer upon meeting the ACW legend/politician.
Senator: The honor is mine, madame.
Lauren: So what do you need to see my uncle about?
Senator: Well, I had a bit of special information to relay to Mr. Irvine, that being, I just took a quick trip to the Chairman's temporary office here, and exercised one of my many, many loophole clauses. Jake Steele is not a man to be trusted, and to ensure the sanctity of the title bout, I have volunteered to be the guest referee.
Voice: What? Really?!
Senator spins around to find the face of XS3 staring back at him, a smirk forming on his face and a look of contentment. As he looks over, XS3 also spots Lauren and gets a big ol' toothy smile on his face.
XS3: Gah! Lauren!
XS3 softly brushes past Senator and picks up Lauren with a gentle bearhug. All Lauren does is wrap her arms around her uncle and grin. Senator looks on at the family bonding moment and looks on in amusement before XS3 sets Lauren down on her feet and turns to face the new referee.
XS3: Look Steve, while you're here, I've got to apologize for pretty much ignoring your advice and going off of the deep end there. Seeing him with all of my possessions and family members just drove me nuts. Way more than I expected. It won't happen this Saturday. I guarantee I will keep a cool head. So again, I'm really sorry for flipping my lid.
Senator: Apologies accepted, but not necessary. I can most certainly understand where Steele would get on your last nerve. Of course, all this will be for naught if you fail to heed my advice. Just go out there, and do what you have to do...I will be a fair and impartial referee, but that does not change my thoughts on which hand I want to raise after the match has concluded.
XS3: I did not expect anything else from you but I'm so glad that someone out there DOESN'T want to turn their back on me. Man, thank you so much and good luck against that punk Mainer.
XS3 and Lauren smile as Senator accepts another handshake from XS3 before taking his leave to go off and fight Danny Mainer… TO THE DEATH! Meanwhile, XS3, though not on anyone's good side, sighs with relief upon finding someone who will actually serve as an ally in a one-sided war against Jake Steele. Lauren and XS3 then turn and walk off to his locker room, discussing the main event tonight and the future of ACW after Fallen Heroes.
Fade.
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Post by Alicia "Atomic" Kitsune on Apr 20, 2009 16:15:34 GMT -5
”And Tonight’s Contest…”
Credit: Danny Mainer The scene stats with Danny Mainer walking in front of the camera with Charlotte King inside the backstage of the ACW arena. Danny has this mad huge grin on his face as Charlotte holds the microphone tightly in her right hand up to her pouty lips. Danny has his hands on hips looking unconcerned and rather gay as he waits for Charlotte to conduct an interview. She brushes her hair to one side as Danny prepares to dish out a pre-written monologue about The Senator. Here goes nothing.Charlotte King: “Ladies and gentlemen I’m stood here next to none other then Danny Mainer who tonight faces off against none other then Senator Steve Phillips. Now Danny, you’ve fought this man before and you came out triumphant. Do you think you can make it two in a row?” Danny Mainer: ”Not only can I make it two in a row but I can make it three in a row, tic tac toe motherfucker. I can go the whole damn way and connect four, I can beat that old wrinkly piece of shit six feet under without even trying. Last time I got into the wring with him, he went on a hiatus and he comes back now to try and grab at glory. That dirty old man is the type of man you find going into parks and peeing on children then YELLING at people when they tell him to stop because it’s part of his constitution. Not only is Senator Steve Phillips a failure of a wrestler but he’s also a failure of a politician. His state has always been a shit hole and quite frankly I have to ask myself why Stevie thinks he can juggle both his careers when he’d be terrible at doing just one. It’s inexcusable that men like him and Jonny Hughes, another man that I’ve beaten might I add gets air-time because people apparently want to watch graceful technical wrestling. To that I say technical wrestling is good and fine but first, put on a show for the crowd. They come to watch you do dangerous feats like soar through the air only to crash and burn through a table.”Charlotte nods in agreement to some extent while trying to weigh up both sides of the argument mentally.Charlotte King: “Fair enough, what else have you got to say about your opponent?” Danny Mainer: ”Well, I’ve already said he pees on children. The man is so old and fat that the only reason he DOES mat-wrestle is because he’s too fucking lazy to climb the turnbuckle. In fact, I don’t even know why he still wrestles. Because Thunderkiss kicked his ass around? Pfft, Hell no. He wants glory again because his political career is going down the toilet. Fact is though, ACW has moved on without him quite nicely and well fact of the matter is I look forward to putting him into retirement again. Old Man Phillips is gonna’ have to be peeled off the mat, glued down only by the exhaustion and sweat he’ll have created when I gave him the best damn ring workout he’ll have had in his less then storied career. Tonight I’ll prove once again why if I don’t win Fallen Heroes I’ll sure as hell make an impact in it by throwing him out on his ass. Let’s go SPORTS FANZ!”Charlotte King: “And what of Fallen Heroes, how do you feel going into that?” Danny Mainer: ”Well I feel pretty confident, I stand as good a chance as any no matter what number I come in and well I think I have the skills to take home the crown and go dethrone Jake Steele at Omega Effect. I have no matches besides the Battle Royale to focus on, I haven’t exhausted myself like Jason Freeman, I’m not on crack like Dan White, I’m not going to fail any urine steroid tests like Thunderkiss, I’m not going to have a heart attack like Senator and I’m sure as Hell not going to turn into an anthropomorphic nose that will mutate into an eight foot giant and destroy the rest of the competition. If not, I’ll do the best I can by eliminating whoever I can from that contest. I’m in to put as many names out as possible. Now, whether I face Steele or not at Omega Effect is irrelevant because I’ll beat him some other day. Thing about Jake Steele is is that I made him and I’ll destroy him.”Charlotte wrinkles her nose at that, Mainer trained Steele? WTFhax.Charlotte King: “Wait, what?” Danny Mainer: ”Yeah, I trained Jake Steele. That kid would still be saving up pennies trying to get some other asshole to train him if it weren’t for me. I taught him everything he knows right up to that finishing move of his but I didn’t teach him everything I know and sure, the one time I fought XS3 I might have lost to that oversized pothead but if I ever face him again I’ll fucking kill him. End of the day the result will always be the same, I’m taking Senator out tonight for a nice seafood dinner and I’ll NEVER call him again. Are you ready for tonight’s blood bath? I’m going to tear him apart and then on Saturday when I make my big screen premiere in Dreams Do Come True I’ll show you all why I’m so awesome. All bullshit aside, Senator good luck out there tonight and try not to defecate on any of the Vietnamese children that may be in attendance. This ain’t 1965, you piece of shit! I’m sending you packing!”The crowd pop for Mainer’s signature catchphrase as Danny storms off to go have his match. Will Danny beat Senator tonight? Well duh, obviously. But will he do it as easily as he says he will? No, probably not, he’s a former World Champion after all. But hey, it’s fun to be confident. Will Danny win Fallen Heroes? Hell to the nizzaw, that’s just plane horseshit. Dan White obviously will. However, he’s going to try and so as he strides off to go have his match one question is left in mind, what will happen to Danny Mainer for Omega Effect? Find out this Saturday.FADE |
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Post by Alicia "Atomic" Kitsune on Apr 20, 2009 16:18:30 GMT -5
Segment: What the Hell Did I Get Myself Into?, Part 2 (Credit: Lee)
The scene opens back up. It now appears to be set up somewhere in an old gymnasium. However on center court of the ring, an old, dusty wrestling ring is set up. Two men, wearing amateur wrestling tights, are circling each other looking into the eyes of one another, as several onlookers wearing similar outfits cheer them on from the sidelines. A man, wearing a wind-breaker, jogging pants, and an old baseball cap wonders in from off the frame. He blows a whistle that he’s been wearing around his neck and barks at the men who are now standing perfectly still in and around the ring.
Tim Dwight: All right ladies, hit the showers, I’ve got a private lesson coming in now.
Several of the men grumble and talk amongst themselves as the file towards a door near the back of the gym. The coach bends over and picks up a clipboard that has been sitting on a nearby table.
Dwight: You did a real good job today fellas…
The coach begins to flip through the clipboard. Suddenly a man, easily recognizable as Lee Homicide tentatively opens a side door to the gym very gingerly, and enters the gym. He’s wearing an outfit similar to those that just left, and seems very nervous as he slowly approaches the coach.
Lee: Um…coach?
The wrestling coach looks up from his clipboard, and a mocking smile breaks over his face.
Dwight: Well if it isn’t Lee Homicide, ACW wrestling superstar. The same man who a few years ago said he was too big for my little wrestling school here.
Lee Homicide coughs awkwardly and runs his hand through his hair.
Lee: That’d be me.
The coach sets down the clipboard, crosses his arms, and glares at the man standing in front of him.
Dwight: So, Mr. Big Shot, what is it that brings you to surroundings as humble as these?
Lee Homicide begins to talk in a very low, quiet tone.
Lee: I have an opportunity to…um…win a match at Fallen Heroes that guarantees me a shot at the world title…and um…it’s already an opportunity to finally prove myself…and…
Dwight: You’re gonna have to speak up boy.
Lee Homicide looks up and awkwardly meets the coach’s eye.
Lee: I need your help if I’m gonna have a chance.
The coach lets out a slow and mocking laugh.
Dwight: Well it’s your money hot rod. Now get into the ring.
Lee Homicide delicately steps up to the ring, and rolls in underneath the bottom rope. He moves to the center, and stands there without moving.
Dwight: Don’t just stand there Nancy! Show me some of those big moves that they taught you out there in the “real world” of wrestling.
Lee Homicide claps his hand together and lets out a deep breath. After a few more seconds he falls flat on the mat, making a rather loud noise. After getting up, he hits the side ropes of the ring, and face plants on the mat again. He gets up, and immediately falls back to the mat. After several more verbose falls, the coach, now with a confused look, blows his whistle prompting Lee Homicide to freeze.
Dwight: What in the hell was that?
Lee: Well uh… in my time in the ring …uh… I’ve kinda had a lot of experience with… uh… getting my ass kicked… and uh… not so much with… uh… the whole offense thing…
The coach rolls his eyes, and picks up the clipboard once again.
Dwight: We have a lot of work to do. I guess we’re going to have to start off with some basic partner exercises.
As Lee Homicide starts to get up off of the mat, a devilish smile begins to grow on the face of the coach.
Dwight: And I’ve got just the gentlemen to work with you…ANDERSON! STEVENS! GET OUT HERE!
The doors to the back of the gym are thrown open, just as the eyes of Lee Homicide open nearly as wide. Two very large men step through and look at the coach, who is now grinning from ear to ear.
Dwight: Yeah, guys I need you to get into the ring, and show our old friend Lee here, just how he do things around here.
Lee Homicide stands with unblinking eyes as the two men approach the ring and pull themselves up to and over the top rope of the ring. Lee Homicide stares up at the two men, who are now towering over him and takes in a large gulp.
Lee: This is gonna be bad…
The scene fades to black.
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Post by Alicia "Atomic" Kitsune on Apr 20, 2009 16:19:00 GMT -5
Segment: REVEAL TO THE MACH! (Credit: Hollywood Mach/?)
[The show comes back from commercials, and "Fury" by Muse hits the P.A system to the sheer dissapointment of the fans. Another speech from the Megastar - "Hollywood Mach". RDK steps through the curtains with his usual apparel, including his signature Macho sunglasses. RDK struts down the ramp and slides into the ring with a mic in hand - and it is apparent that he plans on sayin' a few things.]
Edison: It's the Hollywood Megastar! Leader of the MSA! Hollywood Mach! Randy Dallas KAnyon! He's here McNally, he's here!
McNally: Let's see what "Words of wisdom" the Mach has for us tonight...
[Hollywood takes a deep breath and looks in the air before exhaling and pressing his lips against the mic.]
Hollywood: Lemme say it brudahs - Oooh yeaah, lemme say it out LOUD! The Mach is sick and tired of these mind games goin' on every single goddamned show! THE MACH DESERVES ANSWERS! This has gone on far and long enough! IF I DO NOT GET ANY ANSWERS - I AM GONNA POINT MY FINGER AT THE CHAIRMAN OF THIS FEDERATION, AND I MEAN YOU - GINGERDUDE! SO REVEAL YOURSELF, my "CANADIAN BRUDAH", cause The Mach has had enough! If you're truly an ally - you will show yourself![/color][/font]
Edison: He means business, McNally! Mach isn't pleasant when he gets angry!
McNally: That's for sure, Edison. Let's hope for our sakes that---
[Generic music hits and the masked man comes down the ramp way and into the ring. He gets face to face with Mr. Hollywood. He grabs Mach’s hand and lifts it up to his mouth and speaks into it.]
??: You wanna know?
Hollywood: You're damn right I wanna know! The Mach has a right to know, damnit![/color][/font]
[The mystery man begins to lift off his mask just stopping above his mouth. A visible smile is seen on the mouth and then in one swift lift the mask comes off…..to reveal it to be none other than JONNY SPADE!! Jonny holds out his hand to Hollywood who has a smile on his face and he accepts the handshake and the two share a man hug between each other.]
Edison: What’s going on?
McNally: Its like these two guys knew what was going on from the beginning.
[Jonny takes the mic from Mach and begins to talk.]
Jonny: So guys…surprised? You shouldn’t be. Who else were you expecting it to be that would sign it as “A Canadian Brudah from a different Mudah?”
[The crowd begins to boo.]
But I am guessing that you guys are wondering…why Jonny why? Well it’s pretty obvious I’d say. Mr. Hollywood came to me and proposed this to me and with the offer he gave, I have no reason NOT to do it. And I know that it’s only a matter of time before we become a force to recon with.
Hollywood: You got that right brudah! AND its only a matter of time before the MEGASTAR ALLIANCE helps Hollywood Mach win the FALLEN HEROES BATTLE ROYALE! DIG IT BRUDAHS![/color][/font]
[Jonny looks over at Hollywood with a straight face not liking what he said about helping win the rumble but then turns it to one of smiles]
Jonny: .....YEAH BRUD! *high fives*
[Macho high fives back and "Fury" by Muse hits and the two of them hold up their hands as they make exit the ring and make their way to the back.]
McNally: THE FANS HERE JUST GO SWERVED, Edison! THEY JUST GOT SWERVED!
Edison: That they did McNally, that they did....
[Fade out]
Obvious credit for the mystery character goes to Jonny Spade
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