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Post by Jack Jefferson on Nov 2, 2009 10:21:22 GMT -5
- Johnny Slayer is a real E-Wrestler, he's been around here before. He's one of the many alteregos of Sykova/Chaz Leland/Trent Somethingorother who used Santino Marella as a poser/Matt Maverick. Though shamefully, it was me who invented the Johnny Slayer moniker when he wanted to find a new name for his devil-style alterego to his character. It does kinda' roll off the tongue, even if it sounds like the name of a backyard wrestler (kind of my intention when I thought of it). That still doesn't make me like it - American Soldier: I can't help but make refferences to good films. Ah right, never seen it. Funny clip tho. - American Dentist: Everyone knows that the stereotyping amongst Americans is that us British are clowns who drink tea, worship the Queen and have poor dental hygiene. The reason she specified American dentist was so as to say that if anyone HAD made a fuck-up with her teeth it would've been an American and it wasn't a British person as part of the stereotype. I get what you're aiming at I just feel saying "I've been to an American dentist" was a little forced. I'd have preferred something more along the lines of "My teeth are perfect. The fact you believe such a morose and benale stereotype show just what a worthless meathead you really are!" - The continuity error isn't really an error at all, when on her own Lilith is perfectly capable of handling her own problems with efficiency and brutality. However, when Draven is around she reverts to her submissive self in fear of doing the wrong thing in front of Draven who demands total obedience. There ARE two sides to Lilith and when she's alone, part of her past where little parts of her personality start to show in. Things like her Catholic girls school, head-strong and impulsive nature come into play but that all stops when Draven is around to put the leash on which is almost all the time. Fair enough, and I get the premise although I still feel the whole collared animal side of Lilith is a step too far, but maybe that's just me. The Lilith displayed in the first segment showed two sides nicely in my opinion, because she instantly changed when Draven showed up. Like I say it's just my opinion but I prefer her as downtrodden, subservient and fearful than a Ferrel animal. - Yes, my Manny and Phenomenal's Manny are the same chap. I like the sound of that, if I'm even close to my prediction of what could be coming I'll be very happy. Thank you for the criticisms Jefferson, I'll be doing my own review shortly. Huzzah for more feedback!
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VorteX
Experienced Member
Stay a while...and listen.
Posts: 723
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Post by VorteX on Nov 2, 2009 11:32:51 GMT -5
“Looking for an Opponent” (VorteX) – I don’t know what it was but this segment didn’t quite click with me. The interaction between Gingerdude and Vortex seemed a little odd, more like an interaction with a cheerful teacher and one of his students than employer and employee. Also, why would Vortex have been hyping a match he didn’t know was coming? I did like the random “narrowing down” options though. Vortex was hyping a match that he hadn't been booked for (as I was realistically looking for someone forever until AK asked), and if someone hadn't actually accepted (IE: Gingedude 'found' someone) then I would have had an impromptu match anyway...which isn't a valid match on the books. Also, Vortex is 'insane' to put it simply so I wanted Gingerdude to take on a less strict role in order not to get Vortex riled up. Expect lots of randomness coming out of Vortex for the forseeable future (thinks like 'what if I get abducted by ET' make no sense because they...aren't supposed to ). “A Mystery Unravelled” (VorteX /AK) – Ok, you definitely got me with this one. AK was probably the last person I expected to be Vortex’s mystery opponent! Saying that though the segment felt kinda flat apart from the surprise. I really like the entrance of Vortex, stuff like that is always cool and I thought that part was well written, but when it came down to the actual nitty gritty of the segment it didn’t really wow me. Sorry, but the initial part where VorteX spoke and supposedly got the crowd so hyped felt dead and unenthusiastic; it certainly wouldn’t have gotten me excited. Additionally, the “what do you guys think?” part made me cringe, it felt like pantomime. I did like how this segment put over the Entertainment Title, it has long been a favourite of mine here in ACW and I hope this massive win can help give ‘Tex some momentum and propel him into a truly classic reign where the ET really means something again. (So, no pressure) Honestly, AK is the last person I expected also, and I'm very happy she offered or this match would probably have been terrible (I mean who wants to see me fight Gary anyway?). As for the segment falling flat, it may have, simply because the buildup time for this was nonexistent. We literally did a joint promo in something like a day, so there wasn't a lot of material to work with. Throw in the fact that no one else even showed remote interest at this match or the title and you have me trying to dig some entertainment out of thin air. This is partly why I created the entrance, I wanted it to be something truly entertaining and to hype up the mystery opponent out of literally no material. Thanks for the CC though, I've been looking for feedback on my stuff for a while now and no one seemed to be giving it anymore (I tried for a while but got busy, as we all are). I'd actually be interested in more people's opinion on Vortex as a whole right now as I want to bring the background stuff back, but simplify it a bit so that people actually read it.
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Post by Kim Jong CP on Nov 2, 2009 21:23:20 GMT -5
Well I did have some feedback but Works decided to freeze on me when I went to copy some stuff into it and well it froze. Needless to say there was a lot of nice stuff, really, really enjoyed Torak's work, the Mainer feud with Slayer should be interesting. I'm excited for what's going to happen with the Big Belt now, what with Jefferson and Shadow both having claims to the shot. New guys coming in are also nice, I suggest all of the new guys try and do a segment with them once this month, get there characters established as well as welcome them to the community.
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