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Post by Jonny Spade on May 28, 2009 19:45:07 GMT -5
===================== ACW Entertainment Challenge I.
Chris Phenomenal, Hollywood Mach. Adrian Flamingo, Andrew Black, Yuki Satoshi., Dan White and Vortex: ===================== ACW Thursday Night Meltdown returns to air, as the camera focuses in on the ring, two large tables set up side by side with five pies at each station. The camera zooms in on the entrance ramp as Simply Phenomenal hits the arena and the crowd gets up with a mixed reaction.Superman Dat Hoe! With that Chris Phenomenal emerges at the top of the entrance ramp smiling and makes his way into the ring, ducking between the ropes with his entertainment title in tow. He grabs the mike from Phillip Jones and places his Entertainment title on a small pedestal, facing towards the tables. He waves at the handcuffed Dan White and then looks back at the crowd ready to begin.Chris Phenomenal: Ladies and Gentleman, on Monday the contestants of the first ever ACW Entertainment Challenge were announced, and tonight we get to witness our first challenge, a pie eating contest. The rules are quite simple, whoever finish’s their pies first earns five points towards the standings, the second earns three, and the third place finisher earns one. Any pie throwing results in an automatic disqualification by tonights, Special Guest Referee.Fury by Muse plays as Hollywood Mach makes his way down to the ring, the crowd giving him a wee bit of a hard time.Hollywood: OoOoOoOoOo YEAH!!! The Mach is here tonight, and he’s feelin’ fine. He get to watch some jabroni’s donka donk on outta here, eat some pies, go back and eventually take on my Mega Star brother, Chris Phenomenal at Omega Effect V.[/color] Chris Phenomenal: So without further ado, I guess it’s time to bring out our constestants.Symphony X by Out of the Ashes plays as Vortex makes his way down to the ring.Chris Phenomenal: VorteX.Solid Gold by The Eagles of Death Metal plays as Mickey Flamingo makes his way down to the ring.Chris Phenomenal: Mickey Flamingo.Flower of Carnage plays as Yuki Satoshi makes her way out to the ringChris Phenomenal: Yuki Satoshi.Stimulate by Eminem plays as Andrew Black makes his way down to the ring.Chris Phenomenal: Andrew Black.The King of Rock and Roll by Daniel Lioneye playsChris Phenomenal: and finally, Ashton Kutcher.Ashton Kutcher finally gets in the ring after slapping hands with seemingly everyone in the building, and then poses on the top turnbuckle popping every pose known to human kind. Eventually he takes his place behind the pies.Hollywood: Alright jabroni’s, the rules are very simple. Eat all five pies as fat as you can. On the sound of the ring bell…three…two…one…[/color] *Ding Ding*Chris Phenomenal: AND THERE OFF. Mickey Flamingo is going in with his hands ripping that pie and shoving it in his mouth, Yuki Satoshi is looking for a fork or chopsticks…DAMNIT Yuki just choke it all down…VorteX looks refined as he slams a large piece home. Look at Andrew Black, talk about going balls to the wall he looks like he’s going muff diving as he figures hands are a waist of time.About twenty seconds pass and every competitor save Yuki Satoshi is done the first pie as Ashton throws the pan out and Dan White at ringside smacks it with his cricket bat into the second row.Chris Phenomenal: Now is not the time to be lady like Yuki, open wide and take as much as you can in at one time. Look at Andrew Black he’s in the lead his muff diving approach seems to be working, Ashton Kutcher pulling out…WHIP CREAM…look at the pile of white goodness right there folks, I don’t know how that’s going to help him but we’ll wait and see. Mickey Flamingo is now in the lead folks, two full pies down but Andrew Black is in hot pursuit as he’s about one bite behind. COMMON YUKI you’re not even done one pie yet, ya gotta hurry up, there you go. Yuki Satoshi is done one pie. Look at VorteX go folks, he’s taken the lead from Mickey Flamingo, he seems to be gaining speed as the contest goes on.With that Chris walks over towards Dan White as Hollywood Mach, ever the impartial referee tries to spur Yuki to victory.Chris Phenomenal: Ladies and gentleman I’m here with Dan White, and as we watch VortXe finish off his third pie, neck and neck with Mickey Flamingo who do you think is going to walk out the winner tonight.Dan White looks at Chris Phenomenal, cricket bat in hand without offering a response.Chris Phenomenal: Common Dan, we’re tight, we’re boys ya know. You can’t just give us a little brief insight onto this. I’m sure you’re an expert on the sport of pie eating.Dan White once again offers no response to the question as Chris Phenomenal shrugs his shoulders.Chris Phenomenal: Well seeing as how Dan is a nanny shagging toss monger we’re heading back to the action as VorteX and Mickey Flamingo are neck and neck with Andrew Black trailing by a nose and, oh it looks like Yuki Satoshi is done, she can barely even choke down the rest of her second pie, and look at Ashton Kutcher go folks, it looks as if we’re in a four way tie after four pies and this is going to be close. I don’t know who is going to win, but this quite frankly I pity the losers as they all don’t know what they’re getting themselves into. It appears as if VorteX, a veteran pie eater in his own right is in the lead with half a pie left to go, Andrew Black continues with the face first approach as it appears as if Flamingo is slowing down the pie getting to him as is Ashton Kutcher. It appears as if it’s a two horse race folks, VorteX, Andrew Black, a quarter pie left to go.Chris shuts up for a moment as him and Hollywood Mach get a closer look at the action as Yuki Satoshi is just finishing off the second pie.Chris Phenomenal: Folks we’re about four bites away with Ashton Kutcher slowly grinding past Mickey who appeared to cost himself with that aggressive binge earlier on in the match. Two bites, it’s coming down to who can take the biggest load and swallow it down folks…one bite and the winner is… … … … …
VorteX, with Andrew Black coming in second and Ashton Kutcher coming in third.Flamingo finishes his last bite as Yuki leans against the ropes, the final three pies un touched by the petite asian.Chris Phenomenal: With these results, I’d ask you all to turn your attention to the scoreboard on the Alpha TronName | Andrew Black | VorteX | Yuki Satoshi | Mickey Flamingo | Ashton Kutcher | Pie Eating Contest | 3 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | | - | - | - | - | - | | - | - | - | - | - | | - | - | - | - | - |
Chris Phenomenal: I’d like to commend you all on a great effort, and I’ll see you on Monday at the ACW Anniversary Special for our next event, MIDGET WRESTLING!!!With that Chris Phenomenal ducks out of the ring and heads up the entrance ramp. He stops at the top and turns back and looks at the competitors.Chris Phenomenal: Have a good night boys.The wrestlers in the ring look stunned as Chris Phenomenal chuckles.Chris Phenomenal: Have a good evening folks.With that Chris Phenomenal heads backstage, as the wrestlers stand in the ring looking on in disbelief.
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Post by Jonny Spade on May 28, 2009 19:45:34 GMT -5
The Jokes on You [/color] Credit: VorteX [/center] The camera cuts into the backstage area of the ACW arena, where Vortex is currently trying to locate a bathroom ASAP. Whatever those pies were laced with was not agreeing with Vortex, and he could not be more unhappy about it. That is until he bumped into Kevin Anderson.Kevin: Vortex! Vortex: Not NOW Kevin. Vortex shoves past the overly cheery Anderson and storms into the nearest bathroom. Ever the eager journalist, Kevin follows him in the bathroom.Kevin: No homo I swear! Vortex ignores Kevin’s comment, finds the nearest stall, and closes the door. A few moments pass and than an eruption of sound can be heard from the stall.Kevin: Good lord! How’s that pie taste? It sure smells bad. Vortex: Anderson, leave…NOW! Of course Kevin isn’t about to leave. After all Vortex has done to him in the past month, he is intent on milking this one for all it’s worth.Kevin: My first question is, how does it feel knowing the jokes on you? Vortex: This isn’t an interview Ke… Before Vortex can finish his sentence, another eruption of noise can be heard. The five pies laced with laxatives weren’t Vortex’s only problem, he had also eaten burritos before coming to the show tonight.Kevin: Jesus! What’d Chris do, lace the pies with taco bell food too? Vortex: You WILL pay if you don’t leave Anderson! There is no reply from Kevin, and Vortex is sure that he’s still standing outside the stall door giddy as a 10 year old girl at a Jonas Brothers concert.Vortex: Kevin? Still no answer…maybe he did leave after… Kevin: I’m tweeting. Vortex: What? Kevin: Carla C. asked me “what’s up?” so I figure I better answer her. It’s really starting to smell in here though. Vortex: I’m going to shove that blackberry up your ass when I get out of here! Kevin: It’s not a blackberry, it’s a twitterberry. Vortex lets out a groan, and one can’t be sure if it’s because of Kevin’s smart comment or more revenge from Phenomenal’s “Laxi Pies”. One thing’s for sure, the air is starting to smell like the banana cream burrito from hell.Kevin: Do you mind if I record audio of this monumental event? I would record a video, but I’m pretty sure I can get fired for breach of privacy for doing so. Vortex: And recording audio ISN’T breach of…oh no. Vortex’s sentence is interrupted by what sounds like a thermonuclear bomb going off. The sound is so loud the stall doors actually rattle…and Kevin backs away from the door and right into Gary, who entered the bathroom to see what all the noise was.Gary: Who has tacos? Kevin: Vortex. Vortex: Gary? Please tell me I don’t have another spectator out there. Gary: Vortex! I want one of your tacos! Vortex: Anderson! Kevin: Did you know I just got 10 new followers on my twitter page? You’re internet gold Vortex! Another sound from the stall, either Vortex’s organs have just fallen out or the toilet broke. Either way the sound was anything but pretty.Gary: If you don’t share your tacos with me, I’m not sharing any of Chris’s pie with you! Kevin: You ate it too? Oh boy… There’s no response from Vortex, that is no verbal sound…the stall he currently resides in is filled with what sounds like sonic booms however.Kevin: That is some seriously powerful stuff! You know if we could find out what is in that…I could have a heyday getting revenge on all those guys who shoved me in lockers in high school! At this moment, Gary’s stomach begins to rumble. Kevin shoots him an ‘oh no’ look and backs up. There is only one stall in the bathroom, and Vortex is currently in it.Gary: I don’t feel so good. Vortex, quit hogging the stall! Vortex: You’re going to have to find another bathroom Gary…I’m a little busy here. Gary: No you find another bathroom! Gary promptly walks over to the stall door—oblivious of the situation at hand---and starts pounding on it and yelling for Vortex to get out.Vortex: Gary, go away! Gary: I can’t, I really have to go! Vortex: Go in the sink or something then! Kevin’s eyes shoot open at that remark, and he runs over to the paper towel dispenser. Knowing Gary’s mental capacity and that he WILL take the statement literally, he quickly rips all of the towels out of the dispenser and throws them away. Just as he is finished doing this Gary walks over and looks at the dispenser.Kevin: That’s right, no paper in the dispenser. We don’t want to be unclean now do we? Gary looks bewildered at the situation and his stomach begins to rumble louder. Seemingly on instinct he runs over to the sink…but then looks at the dispenser, the sink, the dispenser and then runs out the bathroom door.Kevin: Thank God! What the HELL were you going for their Vortex? Vortex: I had to get him away from the door somehow… More sounds that are unnatural emerge from the bathroom stall and the air is so thick you could probably taste it…but then you would most likely die from food poising.Vortex: Hey Anderson… Kevin doesn’t have time to respond before the stall door comes flying open and smacks him in the face.Kevin: MY NOSE! Vortex is fully clothed at this point and steps out of the stall. He takes Anderson by the head and throws him into the stall, shuts the door, and jams the locking mechanism.Kevin: OH GOD! OH GOD! THE SMELL! Vortex: You’re lucky the smell is the only thing you have to worry about. I would have given you a swirly but that’s just…wrong. Anyway, this should give you ample material to tweet about. Vortex’s stomach continues to grumble, and he exits the bathroom in search of some antacids.Kevin: VORTEX! OH WHY WON’T IT FLUSH? YOU CLOGGED IT? YOU BASTAAAAAAARD! Fade.=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Book 1: D-Town Chapter 5: Where I Come From Its Called Revenge... Credit: Andrew Black [/i][/center] August 19th, 2008A normal day in the life of me. Woke up, went to work, went to the gym because its Tuesday and now I walk home, hoping fully that I will come home to a father and a brother not just one or the other. It was nice to have a normal day after the crazy weekend. Its been a couple of days since any of us have heard about the Untouchables. It’s almost like they dropped off the map. Same with Nicole; she wasn’t at the gym today and we always walk back together. I didn’t see her at all during the weekend either. Huh.
Anyway, home sweet home. I walk down the dirt road leisurely even though I just said that I just want to be home. I make it halfway down the road which does a U-turn. THe first house on the right after the turn is Nicole’s and then mine is a couple more down. She is lucky she moved out of her parents house and lives alone. I can’t hear the fight going on at my house, but I can see Tommy and my Dad being face to face. Ugh, I wish I had somewhere else to go. I wih I didn’t have to live here. I’ve been telling myself for years that I have to get-. ?: Well well well, look who we’ve got here. And now the normal day is erased. The first man I see is Present Tense, the leader of the rival group the Untouchables and also Nicole’s boyfriend. The other two members of the crew follow him out of Nicole’s trailer. I try to keep walking home, but I don’t make it, I am soon surrounded. Present: You don’t look to happy to see me, Andy. Let me just go home man.Present: That’s probably not going to happen. You see, last Saturday night, I was embarrassed. Not my fault that Jamol beat your ass on the sta-I’m hit from behind; I recognize that clubbing blow as coming from Bull, Present’s muscle. I fall to one knee and look up at Present, my cocky side coming out as all I do is smile. He doesn’t appreciate it and lunges forward with a knee. I hear my nose breaking and feel the blood rush down onto the lower half of my face. As I fall back into the dirt road, the three men that make up the Untouchables continue stomping on me. I get one boot in particular to the eye that is definitely going to leave a mark. They just don’t tire out in what seems like forever that I’ve been lying here until I hear police sirens in the distance. Odds are its not come to get them, but they scatter anyway, like its instinct.
I lie on the ground for a while as they drive off in their black SUV conveniently hidden behind Nicole’s trailer. Dizzy, I take my fingers like I have done many times before, pop my nose back into place. I scream once more with pain before passing out.
Fade to Black. [/color]
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Post by Jonny Spade on May 28, 2009 19:46:17 GMT -5
Segment save just in case.
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Post by Jonny Spade on May 28, 2009 19:46:43 GMT -5
I Refuse To Entertain - ACW Entertainment CupSupermodels Do It… Credit: Andrew BlackMr. Make You Tap is running down the ACW hallway. Having been here a little more than a month has been enough time to acquaint himself with the lay out of the complex arena. He happens to have a handheld camera with him because all you can see is the side of his face as he turns corner after corner. He almost takes out several workers in the process, but once they see the segment later, they will be glad they did not hinder Andrew Black in any way.
Black finally sees his destination and makes a beeline for the door. As the sueprsar gets closer to the door it is easier to see the sign that simply says one word: “Men” Andrew barges into one of the public men’s bathrooms and after taking a brief look around, he takes the first open stall. He puts the camera on deluxe toilet roll holder before kneeling down in front of the toilet. He takes a couple deep breaths in, staring at the water in the toilet before he starts talking, not even turning to face the camera. Andrew Black: Hey Chris. This is what I think of you. This is what I think of your fucking challenges. And this is what I want to do to you hot ass of a mother. Such foul words coming from an eighteen year old boy as he takes he right hand and sticks his middle finger up to the camera. And then he...oh my god, that’s fucking disgusting! The middle finger goes straight into his mouth to the back of his throat, causing a orange liquid to come out of his mouth and into the john. After the long stream, Black spits a couple more times to get the remnants of the vomit out of his mouth. Andrew Black: Do you think I’m stupid? There is nothing entertaining about watching two wrestlers, an actor, an old guy and a schoolgirl eating pie! In about ten minutes, four other people are going to be shitting their brains out. For what? For you entertainment? Do you realize this is a wrestling company? The crowd doesn’t want to see explosive diarrhea, they want fighting. I mean, oo you guys actually like this shit? Andrew turns and vomits once more, probably at the horrible pun he just made. Once again he spits a couple times before turns back to the camera. He takes a couple of deep breaths in, trying regain his composure after losing most of the contents of his stomach. Andrew Black: Have me do whatever you like Chris. I’ll do what it takes to fight you at Omega Effect and to take that Entertainment Title from you. I’ll even force myself to throw up your most likely tainted pies. I mean, if a supermodel can do it, so can I! You can try to make my shit my brains all you want. I’m going to take this little competition and flip it upside down. I refuse to entertain but I refuse to lose. One more spit wad into the toilet and the former Fallout Openweight Champion grabs the camera. He reaches over flushes the toilet, but not before giving the ACW audience a nice view of the once stomach contents of Andrew Black. Mr. Make You Vo-err Tap turns off the camera, ending his first promo towards his new goal: The ACW Entertainment Title.
Cut to Black [/i] [Segment: Kicking it Old School Styles (Credit: Jonny Spade) From the looks of things, it seems that our duo has become a trio…a squished trio but a trio no less. The scene opens to showing Kevin in a janitors closet with G-Unit going over a plan that was apparently made between the three of them.Kevin: You sure that this is going to work? Jonny: I’m positive. This plan is fool proof. These idiots will fall for it no problem. Gooey: And besides you wanted the inside scoop of our plan. What better way to get it than be apart of it. Jonny: Precisely. Kevin: *sigh* All right I will do it. Jonny: Alright Kev, wait give me 10 seconds to get into position and then make your way out into the hallway. Jonny slowly opens the door and peaks around it to see if there is anybody out there. He sees nobody and makes a b-line to somewhere out of sight. Gooey motions for Kevin to head out and wait.
Then with Kevin out there the camera shifts over to seeing two guys walking down the hallway. One happens to be Mr. Willmington and his henchman. While audio can’t be heard from that far distance the video works perfectly and it shows Willmington pointing to a dark haired man whose back is towards the two of them. The henchman nods and begins to charge towards him. The black haired man doesn’t move since he doesn’t know whats going on and gets charged at. He creams the man from behind sending him crashing down to the ground and then he picks him up and throws him up against the wall and then once again he falls face first onto the ground. Mr. Willmington takes off his jacket and gives it to the guy and then kneels down so that he is face with him.Willmington: Hi, Mr. Spade. How is everything going? Good? No? Why aren’t you talking? Not feeling well? Aw that’s a shame. ??: Sorry, I had some food in my mouth, you know its rude to talk with your mouth full of food. Mr. Willmington looks backwards and sees Jonny standing up with an apple in hand, Jonny waves to him and smiles. Willmington cant believe it he turns his head to the henchman and sees him passed out on the ground. Jonny: I don’t know what you feed that guy but he seemed to be pretty sleepy all of a sudden…Mmm this apple is great. Mr. Willmington turns the dark haired man over who happens to be Kevin Anderson in a wig to be made to look like Jonny Spade. Mr. Willmington stands up now and picks up his jacket from the ground and puts it on, then begins to walk backwards away from Jonny but then bumps into Gooey who is standing right behind him.Jonny: Aww where you going? Leaving so soon? Gooey: I hope not, because now the fun times can begin. Listen Willmington; I want an answer. You in for this match or no? Willmington: Now why would I want to be in this wrestling match? I got nothing to lose right now. Jonny: But you got so much more to gain! Because we both know that you’re a smart business man. Me and Gooey are offering you a chance to double your money. Gooey: That’s right. Double or nothing. A cool 200g’s Willmington: While you two do drive a hard bargin why bother when A bird in the hand is better than two in the bush? Mr. Willmington snaps his fingers and two more henchmen come out of nowhere and begin to fight with Jonny and Gooey as Mr. Willmington makes a get a way. Jonny and Gooey knock out their respective fighters and as they do they see Willmington escaping into the parking garage and then moments later car screeches are heard and a car leaving the parking lot.
As they begin to walk down the hallway Kevin begins to come to and Gooey and Jonny go up to him and stand him up on his feet.Jonny: So Kev did you get your inside scoop? Kevin: Remind me to not agree to be apart of your plans EVER again. Fade out.
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Post by Jonny Spade on May 28, 2009 19:47:10 GMT -5
===================== Adrian Flamingo Vs. Thunder Train
Credit: Chris Phenomenal ===================== With both men coming off of big wins at Spring Into Hell this match was sure to be a classic battle. The reigning international champion Thunder Train looking to send a message to Dave Shadow that he doesn’t no what he’s in for at Omega Effect, and Adrian Flamingo, quite possibly the greatest ACW superstar to have never held championship gold looking to slowly work his way back to the top of the ladder. The OpeningThe match started with Flamingo and Thunder Train circling each other, Flamingo looking for an opening given by the much bigger man, and not finding one deciding to take it to Thunder Train, locking up for a brief second and then switching off to the back breaking the hold and putting Thunder Train in a hammerlock. Train grips his shoulder in pain and unable to duck through to reverse the pressure onto Flamingo, drags him to the ropes to force the break of the hold. Flamingo holds on for four before breaking away as Thunder Train shook out his arm to relieve the pain. Eventually Train started to circle back and re engaged with Flamingo this time able to bull him back into the corner and start throwing some vicious rapid strikes to his chest, eventually Flamingo’s chest is as pink as his attire. Train polishes him off with a discus elbow coming out of his chop that drops Flamingo to a seated position. Train backs away, looking on at Flamingo before starting to build up steam, and eventually heading into the corner looking to crush Flamingo between his body and the ropes. Flamingo narrowly escapes the collision however rolling out of the ring. The MiddleFlamingo pulled the feet out from Thunder Train as he stumbled out of the corner after the miss and slid back into the ring and took it to Thunder Train with a few grounded knee strikes, before reverting over the top and locking in a cut-throat camel clutch that kept Train down for about thirty seconds before he was able to manoeuvre his way to the ropes to break the submission hold. Flamingo got to his feet and waited for Train to get there before connecting with a big drop kick that didn’t knock Train over, but allowed him to use the body of Train after he got up to take him down with an impressive step up Frankensteiner showing incredible leg strength to flip Thunder Train. Flamingo quickly crawled across trying to get the fall but Train was able to kick out at two. Flamingo got to his feet and pulled Train up with him and tried to put him into position to connect with his Flamingo Special 1979 but Train was having none of it, reversing it by stepping into the body of Flamingo and lifting him up to his shoulders in to a firemans carry and dropping him out connecting with a devastating single knee gut buster. Train dropped his 360 pound body onto Flamingo to further put strain on the sternum but was only able to get a two count from the referee. The FinishTrain used the locks of Adrian Flamingo to haul him to his feet and connected with a vicious head butt and then whipped Flamingo into the ropes, Flamingo was able to duck the clothesline attempt on the first rebound but on the second wasn’t so lucky as Train had him figured out, the clothesline attempt being used solely to fake out Flamingo as he connected with a vicious Full Steam Ahead, the already targeted ribs of Flamingo quite possibly broken. Train looked to have the match in the bag but Flamingo showed great ring presence by grabbing the ropes, the collision with Train having knocked him probably four feet back. Train got to his feet and signalled that he was ready to end it all, waiting for Flamingo to get to his feet and polish him off with the Om Nom Bomb. Flamingo was slow to his feet, quite possibly a little slower than needed but Train paid little attention attacking Adrian and lifting him to his shoulders but Flamingo slid over the back pulling Train down with him into perfect position for the Flamingo Special 1979 and quickly brought him down quickly not giving Train a chance to counter the move. The result was academic as Flamingo hooked the leg of Train and bringing an end to the contest with an all familiar one, two, three. The WinnerBy pinfall following a Flamingo Special 1979... Adrian Flamingo
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Post by Jonny Spade on May 28, 2009 19:47:42 GMT -5
The Fun Continues [/color] Credit: VorteX [/center] We once again focus in on the backstage area, where Vortex is walking with a bottle of antacids. After the crazy fiasco that just took place in one of ACW’s many bathrooms, the last thing Vortex wants is more laxative fun. Unfortunately for him, he runs right into Gary for the second time tonight.Gary: Wow! I think I cracked the toilet in there…. Gary points to the bathroom door, and then proceeds to make a crushing motion with his hands. Apparently, he is proud of his ability to destroy toilets through ‘butt force’.Vortex: That’s wonderful Gary… Gary: You should have SEEN IT! It was like a giant sea turtle! Vortex: That’s a little TOO much information Ga…At that moment, Kevin Anderson comes running down the hallway holding his face. Apparently he has been freed from his stall prison and is in dire need of….Kevin: VIIIIIIISINNNNNNNNNEEEEEEE!!!! Yeah, that. Looking half-blind and very red faced, Kevin blows past Vortex and Gary and runs down the hallway towards the clinic area.Gary: Wow! Vortex: Wow indeed. Maybe he can tweet about how regurgitated burrito tastes. Gary: Re-gurgimitated? Vortex: “Butt burrito.” Gary’s eyes shoot wide and he gets a look of ‘oh I’ve just been punched in the face’, and backs up a few steps.Gary: EWWW! Kevin eats butt burritos? Vortex: Sure. Apparently Kevin heard this from all the way down the hallway as he comes rounding the corner like a bat out of hell.Kevin: I DO NOT EAT BUTT BURRITOS YOU PRICK! Back around the corner he goes. Gary: He seems angry. Vortex: Well when you play with fire, expect to be burned. Gary: Fire? Where? Vortex: Metapho…nevermind. At this point Vortex’s stomach begins grumbling again, so he unscrews the cap on the antacids and takes a few. Gary takes note of this and grabs the antacids from Vortex. Noting the many colors he mistakenly thinks…Gary: CANDY! Vortex: Wait! Too late, for Gary is chugging antacids like a drunk at a frat party, colored chewables flying everywhere. He finishes his antacid binge and looks utterly disgusted.Gary (spewing powder): Yhuck. Vortex: Nasty stuff. Gary nods his head in agreement and spits the contents of his mouth onto the floor. He looks up at Vortex and says the oddest thing…Gary: I’m hungry. Vortex: Yeah…I’m not so hungry. Just be sure to stay away from the dessert, who knows what’s inside. Gary: Probably not candy. And with this, Gary is off in search of food. Vortex can do nothing but laugh and shake his head, a little scared of what Phenomenal has in store for the rest of this ‘Entertainment’ Challenge.
Fade.
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Book 1: D-Town Chapter 6: Can’t All Be Bad Credit: Andrew Black [/center] August 19th, 2008And after my ass whooping, my day returns to normal. I eventually pick myself off the ground and make my way to the place I have to call home. I kick open the door and the yelling between my father and brother that was most likely occurring stops. As if my dad wasn’t anger enough, the blood that covers my jaw, and dirt on my clothes, the forming black eye on my right side. My brother looks about as shocked as Roger does. Roger Black: And where in the flying fuck have you been? I tripped.Tommy: Was it Present? Roger Black: Who the fuck is- Knock! Knock! The door is already slammed open so Nicole Valentino can just walk into our trailer. I turn to her and she sees the mess that her boyfriend made me into. She gasps and puts his hands over her mouth, and I look down, not wanting to look her in the eye. Tommy walks into his room and locks the door. My dad is too tired for this and just sits in his chair. Nicole grabs my hand and softly says c’mon. [/color] Trying not to jizz in my pants at her touch, I follow to her house. She eventually lets my hand go and I can breath again. She turns around and smiles and I smile back, my teeth being the only thing not covered in blood. We make our way into her trailer, which she keeper nice that our. She pulls up a seat to the kitchen area and I sit. She wets a rag and hands it to me and I clean off my face. I get most of it, but apperently not all of it, as she takes the rag herself and starts to clean.[/center] Nicole: So Connor did this to you? Who?Nicole: You guys didn’t know his name was Connor? Nah.Nicole: Ah. I’m really sorry about this, I had no clue it was going to happen. Connor gave me some money to go shopping with friends and I didn’t think anything about it. He’s been awfully nice to me lately. I think I might even sell this place soon and move in with him. I look away again, and she moves my head to get the last stain on my face. Nicole: There, good as new. Except that black eye...and he ruined thee clothes. Too bad you couldn’t have gone shopping with me. Heh. No, I don’t have the money for that kind of thing.Nicole: Why not? You work full time, don’t pay rent…. I’m saving up. I’m getting out.She is the first person I’ve told and she didn’t really know what to do. At first she smiled, but then she just looked sad. I mean, I don’t want to spend my life here. I actually have enough and plan to leave whenever I can. Just gotta turn eighteen.Nicole: But your brother… Yeah I know, but he is getting to that age where he can take care of himself. He’s a strong kid, just not physically. He’ll do fine on his own.Nicole: And your friends?
They don’t need me. Me and Jamol haven’t been seeing eye to eye lately anyway. But this isn’t final. I don’t really know where I am going. I have a couple options but nothing is set yet. So we’ll see I guess.Nicole: Yeah… Now she is the one to break eye contact. I reach out and touch her upper arm causing her glance up. You ok?Nicole:Mmhmm. So what did you whisper in Pres...Connor’s ear the other night?Nicole:Well… She moves in closer and I’m freaking out. Nicole: I said “don’t do anything. You know how much I care about him.” And the tension is thrown out the window as we start kissing right then and there. Probably not my smartest move, seeing as her boyfriend just kicked the shit out of me. And probably not her smartest move seeing as he’ll probably kick the shit out of her too. I doubt she even said that to him. I’m not even thinking these things, I don’t know why I am still narrating. I pick her up and we move into her bedroom.
Fade To Black
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Post by Jonny Spade on May 28, 2009 19:47:59 GMT -5
"Slaughterhouse" Credit: Danny Mainer/Jake Steele Minato, night time. The Japanese Nightlife industry is forever blossoming and well Danny has taken advantage of that. For the past few months Raymond King and Danny Mainer have invested lots of money into a construction which in the back of a black Mitsubishi Lancer Danny Mainer is slowly driven to by an Asian Mobster with black sunglasses. On the phone and looking good in a black open collar shirt with a big silver neck, he sips a can of coke.Danny Mainer: "I'm about five minutes away, yeah? Alright dude, chill. It's a big hit? Great. Otherwise it would've been pointless getting my celebrity guest in..."Danny listens in with a big grin on his face to the chatter on the other end. Smirking and sipping his coke, he replies.Danny Mainer: "That's a surprise, he SHOULD already be in the building but he's waiting for his nine o'clock on time. Just make sure the DJ knows to get the fuck out of the way at that time because this guy will be taking over as Master of the Ceremonies after then. A'ite? Cool, cool. Just pulling up now, cya in side man. Bye."The car turns down the long curve road into a big converted parking lot which is filled with all types of cars and people having a smoke and chilling out in the fresh air. The car goes to the other end of the car park and heads down a downward road into a private garage. The electronic door slides up and the car parks. Both men then get out and head down a long flight of stairs stopping on the second floor into the personal offices. Putting his eye to a retinal scanner, the door slides open to where he's greeted warmly by Raymond King.Raymond King: "DANNY! Man, you have no idea how awesome this is! It's fuckin' class man! This was GENIUS! The place is alive and filled with more Asian coochie then Vietnam! Yeah we're gonna' get shit-faced tonight! Come with me man!"Danny Mainer: "A'ite, let's roll!"Danny and Ray head through double-doors onto a big balcony, heavy bass shaking the walls of this former sewage plant. Spotlights flash on and all eyes are upon Danny and Ray. Stepping forward to the DJ deck he looks almost lost stepping out into the view of all the Japanese men and women as the music grinds to a halt. Though they may not all be fluent in American, they all echo the same sentiments to the man himself who's opened this club. He looks down at the throngs of people, all hot and sweaty from dancing. It's a beautifully constructed place, a bar queud up as the sake flows and the Japanese beer is guzzled down by these beautiful people. It's a marvellous sight and they're all waiting for his word. The DJ passes him a microhphone and he looks out into the crowd, changing into Japanese dialect.Danny Mainer: *In Japanese* "Hello! It's an honour to be here, thank you all for coming out! Uhh, are you liking the Slaughterhouse?"The crowd go ballistic, they cheer and scream and Mainer bows in response to their appreciation. They LOVE this place.Danny Mainer: "Alrighty then! Well, I'm not gonna' keep you here long! Alls I'll say is this! Tonight is your night to get shit-faced and wake up next to a total stranger! It's your night, I'm all available for any bored groupies and well! Enjoy yourselves! Next round is on me! Now please, give it up for guest DJ YOJI BIOMEHANIKA!!!"The crowd cheer again as the Japanese legendary DJ makes his way out and starts to play tunes, while the clubbers flock towards the bar to collect on Danny's promise relishing the opportunity to get a little more drunk for free. Danny heads back through the double doors, having worked up a sweat under that spotlight. Danny and Ray walk together through the backstage climbing up a long set of stairs. At the end of those steps is a retinal scanner door, Ray unlocks it and the two walk out onto a balcony even higher then the one Mainer just gave his speech from. However, this one is an exclusive VIP lounge. Three girls in short black dressess as well as the couple of the moment, Jake Steele and Misono are all enjoying beers as Jake is mid-way through telling a story.Jake Steele: "And den I kneed the old muthafucka in the face and dislocated his jaw! Hahaha! Bitch didn't see it coming at all! He thought it was that fat fuck Teeks and I just jumped at him and knocked his ol' white ass ou-"His speech is cut short when he notices that Mainer is there. It maybe the alcoholic stupor acting but he shouts out to him with a big huge grin on his face, pretty much in Rick James mode.Jake Steele: "WHITNESS! What's happenin' wit' ya nigga!?"Danny Mainer: "Hey dude! Enjoying yourself?"Jake Steele: "Ya damn skippy I'm havin' a good time! Place could be a little better, but fuck it I'm drunk! Where you find dis spot anyway?"Danny Mainer: "Credit given where credit is due, King found this place."Raymond King: "Yup, like Martin Luther King I had a dream to make Minato the very beating heart of Japanese culture."Danny Mainer: "With my money, his locationing and our combined brainpower you got this little place."Jake Steele: "I'm diggin' it! Even if it ain't da best, it still got enough for me! Dranks, loud music and my championship gold! I have to thank you for inviting me nigga!"Danny Mainer: "Thanks for not kicking my ass last week!"Jake Steele: "Thank Misono for dat shit! I was about to smash yo greasy ass through a popcorn machine but man, tonight we gonna party! Jake Steele style, ya dig? See who's da better man in a game I like to call... drink. YOU DOWN MAINAH!?"Danny Mainer: "Bring it the fuck on! You're going to have a badass hangover!"One of the girls pulls out a large bottle of Kirov Vodka and places it on the VIP coffee table. She unscrews the cap as another one pulls out a small briefcase of shot glasses. Mainer takes a seat the other side of the table while Steele hands his beer and title to Misono.Jake Steele: "Hold my drink, bitch."She laughs and puts the stuff to one side as both men pour their vodka ready to go. The screen fades to black as both men go for their shot glasses. After a few seconds of total blackness all that can be heard is...Jake Steele: "OH SHIT, I CAN'T FEEL MY FACE!"FADE
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Post by Jonny Spade on May 28, 2009 19:48:33 GMT -5
Third Time's a Charm.... By Dave Shadow and Thunder Train As we cut backstage again, Charlotte King stands outside a door, somewhere in the ACW arena. She looks rather impatient as she begins speaking into the camera.King: Well, ladies and gentlemen, I was told to make my way to this backstage storage room to witness something special. But.... well, I’ve got no idea what the surprise is. As she finishes her sentence, the door to the room slowly opens, but only a little bit. Much to her dismay, she recognises the head which twists through the crack in the door. With the long, dirty white hair and the perverted grin, it can only be one man.
King: Shadow. Dave: Hey King. Got my message then?King: Whats this about Dave? Dave: I got something I want to show you.King: Woah, no. I’m not falling for that one again. Dave: I swear it’s nothing rude this time.Dave looks both ways up and down the coridoor, before opening the door some more and waving King to come inside. King looks reluctant, but her curiosity wins out and she waves for the cameraman to follow her inside. As they move inside, the picture on the screen becomes blank. The room is shrouded in darkness, and King isn’t able to see a foot in front of her. A voice comes out of the blackness over her shoulder, giving her a fright.
Dave: Are you ready?King: I am sure I’ll regret this, but go for it. A clicking noise echoes through the silence which descends on the room now, like a light switch being flicked. Suddenly, a booming voice rings out of the darkness; the voice of Dave Shadow. It’s as if a recording is being played back....
Voice: Thunder Train! Are you ready to get what you so rightly deserve!Suddenly, a blinding light illuminates on the far side of the room, followed by green lasers starting to shoot round the room in a dramatic fashion. The lasers hit every corner of the massive storage room and bounce around back towards the center of the display. Pyro starts to rise up and it is now that King realises there is a massive montage of pictures on a makeshift wall in the middle of the room, being framed by the fireworks. The pictures show Thunder Train in various victorious poses, and in the middle is a massive picture of Train holding the International Championship over his shoulder, smiling and posing for the camera.
“Wind Beneath My Wings” starts to blare over a sound system, as the laser show gets more and more frantic. King can’t help but laugh, as she realises the song is being sung by Dave Shadow. She glances back over her shoulder and notices Dave standing behind her. Both of them wear massive big grins over their faces, dazzled by the amazing display.#Did you ever know that you’re my Hero? You’re Everything I would love to be! And I can fly higher than an Eagle! Cause you are the wind beneath my wing!# As the song builds towards its crescendo, the laser and firework display gets more and more impressive, before one final explosion illuminates the entire room. Balloons and confetti start falling down from the ceiling, as the lights come back on.
Dave: Well?King: Dave, that was awesome. Dave: Hehe, thanks. It’s taken me days to get all this set up for Train. Now, if you don’t mind, I’ve got to get everything all set up. I was wondering if you could go and get train to come here? Just tell him to come here in about 20 minutes, ok? And don’t tell him why?King nods and runs back out of the room, heading off to find Train. Dave rubs his hands together, proud of himself. He opens the door to the coridoor and beckons in some ACW aides to help him set up the display again. Tiding the balloons and confetti, resetting all the fireworks and making sure the lasers are ready to go, Dave can’t help but smile.
Dave: if this doesn’t get me on his good side, I don’t know what will. Dave takes a bottle of water out of one of his pockets and takes a big drink. As he does though, one of the aides bump into him by accident, and Dave drops the bottle. Dave raises his fist as the aide flinches, and runs. Dave runs after his bottle which rolls towards the display and picks it up, but not before half of the contents empty out onto the floor. Dave swears loudly before heading off.
As he leaves, the camera shifts down and focuses in on the trail of water which moves towards some electrical plugs behind the display.....some static noises come off them, as Dave orders everyone out of the room. =========== Shifting back out into the hallway, King leads Train down towards the door. He holds one hand over his eyes while she holds the other, guiding him.Train: Come on Charlotte, what’s this about? I'm trying to eat my breakfast.King: I’ve got a surprise for you-- Wait, you are still eating breakfast? Nevermind! I told you, you can’t see anything till we get there. Train: Oh man, I love surprises! Especially if they involve chocolate cake.King: Ok, here we are. The two stop outside the room, as Train looks at the door excitedly. King motions him on as he opens it. The darkness doesn’t scare train, as he giggles like a school girl and walks inside.
As soon as the door closes behind him, Dave comes into shot of the camera. King and Dave put their ears to the door, as they hear the voice booming over the sound system again.
Voice: Thunder Train! Are you ready to get what you so rightly deserve!“Wings Beneath My Wings” starts to play again, but as it does, the two hear a massive bang coming from inside the room. They look at each other, puzzled, as more and more explosions start to occur. And not the good “OMG, teh pretty fireworks” type of explosions. The music playing starts to skip, and eventually the sound system gives out; a large screeching noise causes King and Dave to pull back from the door, holding their ears.
The large explosions give way suddenly to numerous little bangs, as a massive thud hits the door. It flies open, as Thunder Train comes diving out. Dave and King look in, as fireworks shoot off dangerously in all directions. The falling confetti has also caught light, as fire seems to rain down from the ceilings. Dave and King’s jaws are nearly on the floor in horror. Train uses the wall to help himself up....Train: What the hell was that! Someone tried to kill me!Dave: Train, I swear....It is only now that Train realises Dave is here.Train: YOU! You’re behind this? What? Trying to crush me didn’t work so you thought you could blow me up? Dave: Oh for fu....Train: You think this is what I rightly deserve, huh? Thats what the message said! I deserve to die? That's cold man!Dave: Now hang on, the context changed.Train: Why Dave? What did I ever do to you that you thought “I’m going to try and kill Train”. Why Dave? It doesn't make any sense...Dave: Train, I swear....Train: No Dave, I swear that come Omega Effect, I’m not going to just beat you. I’m going to murder you.Train turns and storms off down the corridor again. Dave falls back against the wall, his eyes open and tears starting to stream down his cheeks. He slumps down to the floor, as King sits down beside him.
Dave: I’m not a bad person. I mean well.King: I know. As Dave puts his hands up to his face to wallow in his own self pity, King motions to the cameraman, making a cut throat motion. The message is clear; Dave is a dead man walking.[FADE]
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Post by Jonny Spade on May 28, 2009 19:48:55 GMT -5
M U S C L E M A N strike a pose[/center][/font] Rena: Men's fitness. Bryce was seated in Rena's confortable office when she threw what looked to be a magazine on the table top. She smiled, guiding him with her hand to look at the cover. Bryce: Yeah, so? Rena: That will be you next month. Bryce: Yeah? They beg for the Brycemeister. Rena: Hahaha, no. I pulled some strings and they accepted my offer. Bryce: Offer? Rena: Money makes the world go around, Bryce. Bryce: You PAID money for me to be on that cover? They should be begging BEGGING to have this body on the cover. Rena: But see the thing is people need to know you. And that lose tonight just didn't help anything at all. I know, I know, it wasn't your fault. Bryce: Well aren't you supposed to help me? Rena: I was on the phone getting you an interview with Jimmy Fallon. Bryce: Huh? Rena: You'll be on Jimmy Fallon in a few weeks, and I got you on Oprah in a week or so. She'll confirm a date with me soon enough. Bryce: I'm not going on fucking Oprah. Rena: Oh, yes, you will. Bryce: Fuck that shit. Rena: BRYCE, YOU ARE GOING TO OPRAH. YOU WILL TELL PEOPLE TO LOOK UNDER THEIR CHAIRS AND YOU WILL OPRAH HUG HER! Bryce: Holy fuck, alright. Rena: Good. Bryce: So is that everything? Rena: Yes, you can go now. I have a meeting with Ginger right now. Bryce: What for? Rena: I'm trying to get you a high-quality match. But you need to work hard because your loss has now hindered my case quite a bit. Bryce: Man, I don't need no high-quality match. I AM high quality. Rena: riiight. Okay, this is the thing. You need a match with a popular wrestler. This will keep you in the spotlight. Bryce: Whatever you say. Rena: Well that's everything. You can leave now. Bryce: C'ya He stood up and left, leaving Rena alone to await Ginger's arrival.[fade]
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Post by Jonny Spade on May 28, 2009 19:49:24 GMT -5
===================== Attempted Murder, Revisited..
Chris Phenomenal and Danny Mainer ===================== It’s been two months since the Genocide PPV which saw Danny Mainer and Chris Phenomenal open fire on each other on top of the ACW arena roof. While there behaviour on the European tour did not result in any problems, it’s sure to come to a close with both of them now confirmed to be in the Crucible Match at Omega Effect V. Danny Mainer greets the ACW audience standing by with Charlotte King.Charlotte King: I’m standing next to Danny Mainer, the orchestrator of the Crucible match at Omega Effect V. Now Danny, I’m sure everyone has been wondering how you came up with the idea. Danny Mainer: "Well, simply put I'm a fan of great literature. A man named Arthur Miler wrote this little play called The Crucible which was a metaphor for McCarthyism and the irrational fear of communist traitors living in America. In writing that and publishing it, Arthur was nearly imprisoned several times rather like the events of the play."Charlotte King: With the number of up and comers already announced for this match, how do you plan to attack them. Run down Rawt, then Lee, and start to talk about me. Mainer is interrupted by the man he had just begun to talk about, Chris Phenomenal. Mainer stops and looks at Chris, who smiles as wide as a five year old in a candy shop.Chris Phenomenal: I’m sorry, am I interrupting something?Chris stands by waiting for Mainer to continue but all he does is stare back at him through his merciless INSERT COLOR eyes.Chris Phenomenal: Well go on.Chris stands back and continues to wait for Mainer to talk but nothing is getting accomplished. Finally Chris breaks the stalemate.Chris Phenomenal: Nice eye, by the way.The camera focuses in on the hideous right eye of Danny Mainer, bruised and bloodied after the shot from Rawt Ross on Monday night. Chris looks at Mainer, trying to make him snap but he won‘t.Chris Phenomenal: Not talkative today Danny? Worried about the pregnancy of that gutter slut?Not even petty insults move Danny Mainer, a stark contrast to the last time these two faced off. Chris takes a few moments to gather himself before breaking out in usual Phenomenal fashion.Chris Phenomenal: Alright Mainer, you can stand there trying to figure out a way to suck your own cock, but you know what at Omega Effect, you aren’t going to be able to run away from me. I’m not going to take a gun and blow your brains off because I’ve realized that your life is so pitiful that doing that is a service to you. Instead I’m set on winning this match at Omega Effect V, I’m focused on bringing the Crucible Contract back to the Mega Star Alliance side, I’m focused on heading out to the ring and taking everything you hold dear away from you. In fact I might even have a special guest at ringside. Her long black hair, her stunning eyes, the INSTERT MONTHS PREGNANT bump that she’s grown only adding to her beauty. Mainer atop that ladder I won’t only take the title, I’ll take your women, and you’ll be forced to look on as we celebrate OUR successes.Chris smiles at Mainer knowing this has to cause him to lash out. Chris is surprised however by the calm nature of Mainer as he smoothly replies.Danny Mainer: You know what Chris, you’re the biggest bull shitter in ACW history. You constantly talk smach like you’re the bees knees, and never back it up. If you really want to make a statement, prove that you’re serious, why don’t you and I step into the ring tonight, really see who the better man is.Chris looks at Mainer, trying, helplessly trying to hold a straight face but it’s impossible as Chris bursts out laughing and walks away for a few seconds to compose himself before returning.Chris Phenomenal: Rawt must have fucked you up even better than I thought. If you seriously think you can keep up with the Phenomenal one, then I accept. I’ll see your ass in the ring tonight.Chris Phenomenal brushes past Mainer as Charlotte and Danny look on and the scene fades out.
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Post by Jonny Spade on May 28, 2009 19:49:41 GMT -5
Segment: Hitman of the Ghosts! (Credit: Train and Hitman [of the ghosts])
A stormy...evening...I guess, whenever we have our show, is fitting for tonight's show. We show the outside, cars lined up in the ACW parking lot with all the owners inside enjoying themselves for a good old fashion wrestling show. The rain is pouring hard. Oh look, three people are hanging out in front of one car, their battery has died. I wonder why, OH THAT'S RIGHT, JUSTIN FUCKING LEAVES THE FOG LIGHTS ON SO WE HAVE TO WAIT AN HOUR FOR SOMEONE TO GIVE US A JUMP START. Ahem, sorry.
Inside of the building, we are at the Road Steelers locker room. Thunder Train sits on the couch with a blanket over him, shivering in fear. Any little creaking noise in the floor causes him to flinch. The power is off which causes Train to use a candle that sits on the coffee table in front of him. The power really isn't off, Train is just stupid enough to think it is when the lights didn't turn on and he heard demon noises (It was the garbage disposal). Suddenly, a knock at the door. Train jumps then gets up very slowly. He gets to the door and turns the handle. He pulls it open..Nothing...
Thunder Train: Ahhh....
?: Boo.
Thunder Train: AHHHHHHHHHHH!
Train slams the door shut and runs back to his couch. The door opens up again and in walks Hitman, a bemused look set on his face.
Hitman: Some beast you are.
Thunder Train: Is this how you ghosts get your laughs? Scaring the shit out of the living? It's a good thing that I can't hit you or else you'd be asking for it.
Hitman: Well, you have a chance. Guess what.
Thunder Train: You are going to leave me alone?
Hitman: You and I are going to fight each other. Anniversary show.
Train gets a puzzled look on his face.
Thunder Train: How the hell....AM I SUPPOSED TO FIGHT A DEAD GUY?
Hitman: This is to prove I'm not dead, asshole. I wouldn't mind having my first proper match being for the International title, either.
Thunder Train: Wait, you talked to Gingerdude. Does that mean Gingerdude is dead to? About time, he has been living on borrowed time for a while now.
Hitman: ...
Thunder Train: So, when I "face" you at the anniversary show and I can't hit you or pin you, does that mean you win? Or we will go to a draw because nobody can do anything.
Hitman: Look, I'm going to tell you nice and slow. I'M. NOT. DEAD.
Thunder Train: Wait, if you pick up a weapon and begin beating me with it, would you get DQ'd. I don't think the referee would be able to see you. OH GOD! What if your other ghost buddies come out and jump me as well. I am going to die and then be forced to join you guys.
Hitman: I don't think--
Thunder Train: What if you guys somehow start to eat my soul?!?!? The Train is always hungry, but ghosts shouldn't be! OH GOD! IS IT GONNA FALL OUT LIKE CASPER? That was pretty nasty.
Hitman: ...maybe I should have just stayed in Oslo.
Thunder Train: OH HO! GHOST MIND TRICKS NOW EH? Those won't work against the Train. I've got a brain of steel. AND DON'T FORGET, IF YOU MESS WITH THE TRAIN, YOU GET THE TRACKS!
Hitman: That doesn't even make sense. YOU AREN'T MAKING ANY SENSE!
Thunder Train: No Hitman, you aren't making any sense. Now get the hell out of my chocolate factory.
Hitman: Chocolate factory?
Thunder Train: OUT!
Hitman: ...
Thunder Train: NO! OUT OF MY CHOCOLATE FACTORY!
Hitman: Try and regain some sense of sanity. It'll come in handy when I kick your ass all over the arena on Monday. Nutjob.
Hitman gives a WTF face and slowly leaves. Train kicks the door closed then turns around with a smirk on his face.
Thunder Train: Heh, that'll show him. I just outsmarted a ghost. Now, I'll do something nobody else has ever done before, beat a ghost....muahahhahahhaa.
With Train having officially lost it, he turns on the lights and watches some TV. I mean, what else is he gonna do? I guess we will see what Train WILL DO at the Anniversary Show.
Fade.
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Post by Jonny Spade on May 28, 2009 19:50:18 GMT -5
"MATCH: Chris Phenomenal VS Danny Mainer" Credit: Danny Mainer MATCH BEGINNING:Technical encounters FTW! Chris took the pace of the match by snapping Danny in a side headlock and taking him straight to the mat. Then, in side control position he would repeatedly knee Mainer in the stomach. He'd then scoop up Mainer and lift him up right off the mat and drop him with a Gorilla Press Slam. Mainer wheezes and Chris quickly gets back to his feet. He whips Mainer to the ropes who baseball slides his way out of the ring. Chris chases after him sliding out of the ring, Mainer bounds around the stairs and slides into the ring bouncing off the nearest ropes as Chris climbs in to kick him straight in the head. Chris collapses onto his face and Mainer slaps on a Fujiwara Armbar. Chris is dazed but after twenty seconds of the submission Phenomenal forces his way out. Phenomenal grabs Mainer and Scoop Slams him to the mat before jumping up with a big-ass leg drop. Then, he delivered an AA spinebuster and got a 2-count. It was not over. MATCH MID-SECTION:Mainer had sealed control of the match with a Springboard Crossbody crashing ontop of Phenomenal with fury. Mainer then dropped The Phenom with a Sweeping Kick. Mainer then bounced off the ropes with a Springboard Moonsault covering for a narrow 2-count. He then attempted to Belly to Belly Suplex the Entertainment Champion, but shit just wasn't happening and it ended up with Mainer being crushed by The Phenomenal Driver and a 2-count. Mainer kicked out however. Phenomenal whipped Mainer but he came back with a running takedown and Mainer quickly scooted into Mount Position drilling him with repeated shots to the face. Mainer got up and stalked Phenomenal leaping onto his back with a Sleeper Hold. Phenomenal just threw him off though and kicked him in the spine while he was down. He then scoops up Mainer and attempted a SUPERMAN PUNCH but Mainer caught it and flipped into a Meat Hook wrenching the arms of Chris. This submission move was held on well but Chris finally managed to escape the hold because he's never gon' tap. MATCH END:Disaster struck, Mainer tried to hit a Stinger Splash to a cornered Chris but he threw the reff in the way who was the victim of a gay man sandwich. Capitalizing on the distraction, Phenomenal just popped Mainer in the mouth before mocking him by leaning back and putting his hand on an "invisible" extended gut so as to mock Caitlynn's pregnancy. Mainer was KO'd so he couldn't respond. Phenomenal then looking at Dan White who, handcuffed to the bottom rope notably has a cricket bat clutched in his hands. Dan waves it under the bottom rope, beckoning for Chris to come near like he's Ivan Pavlov. Chris goes over to take the bat but Dan pulls the bat back and refuses to give it to him to the delight of the audience. Chris started yelling at Dan unaware that the supposedly KO'd Mainer was waiting for him and pissed off. Chris decides to sack it and finish the job off but when he turns around he sees Mainer leaping up with a Hurricanrana. Chris is sent tumbling forwards and left draped over the second rope. Mainer up to his feet does the Richard Nixon Victory pose before hitting The 702. The crowd were on their feet as the kick connected. Phenomenal stumbled to his feet slowly as Mainer dashed back in the ring and dropped him with a violent Psycho Holiday. Phenomenal was left out cold on the mat and Mainer scored the 3-count.
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Post by Jonny Spade on May 28, 2009 19:51:03 GMT -5
===================== My objectives are my concerns.
Chris Phenomenal ===================== Busy night for Chris Phenomenal, the first leg of the ACW Entertainment Challenge, a confrontation with Danny Mainer, to taking the loss via a Psycho Holliday. His night is far from over as he is corralled by Kevin Anderson on his way back following the pie eating contest, .Kevin Anderson: Chris, a word if I may? Chris sighs, his night growing longer with every passing second. He is able to shake of the weariness however and walks toward Kevin.Chris Phenomenal: Make it snappy Kevin, I got some business to take care of tonight.Kevin Anderson: Alright then. I’m sure everyone is wondering your thoughts on the first event of the Challenge and what did you mean by “have a good night boys“ and then following it with that laugh that inevitably means you‘re up to no good.? Chris Phenomenal: I think it was fucking amazing Kevin. It’s not something you see every day, ACW superstars in the ring trying to eat the pies as fast as they can. As for my comments, I’m going to have to eventually face one of these guys in the ring and it’s never to soon to start getting into their heads. Plus keep watching tonight to see some of the most disturbing crap, and yet most hilarious shit ever. I can’t wait to see their reactions as I’ve hired cameraman to follow them wherever they go and see just how they react to what‘s coming..Kevin Anderson: Fair enough then, what about the situation with Thunderkiss. The past two weeks we’ve seen you and him form some sort of alliance, yet you already a part of one. Have you left the Mega Star Alliance for good? Chris Phenomenal: When did anyone say anything about leaving the Mega Star Alliance, I’m MSA4LYFE Kevin, and you can’t change that, you can’t take the fight out of the dog. As far as Thunderkiss is concerned I’ve got my own motives to watching his back.Kevin Anderson: Care to elaborate? Chris Phenomenal: No.Kevin Anderson: Doesn’t it leave you in a tough spot tonight though, with Hollywood Mach and Thunderkiss on the opposite sides of tonight’s strange bedfellows tag match? Chris Phenomenal: On the outside it would appear that way Kevin, but everything’s under control. I know exactly what I’m going to do tonight and I’m sure both parties will be happy.With that Chris brushes past Kevin Anderson to god knows where, what’s for certain though is the fact that his long night is far from over.
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Post by Jonny Spade on May 28, 2009 19:51:34 GMT -5
Segment: You Left Me Man! (Credit: Train) We open inside of some hospital somewhere. The exact location, much similarly to Evolution, is a mystery. A hospital bed is seen with a man laying in it with his head wrapped up in bandages. Without warning, a thumping noise is heard. The doctors and nurses run for their lives! Thunder Train appears, looking concerned. He spins his head around trying to find something, or someone. He focuses in on a bed and goes to it.Thunder Train: I'm sorry I couldn't get here sooner Thunder Lawyer. I've been very busy as of late with everything and I didn't have the time.Thunder Lawyer: *Muffled Speech* Thunder Train: I didn't quite catch that.Thunder Lawyer: *More Muffled Speech* Thunder Train: Oh well, I guess I can't hear you, but you can hear me!For the sake of making this make sense, we will be able to hear Thunder Lawyer but Train can't.Thunder Lawyer: Oh God...someone kill me now. Thunder Train: Oh yes, I quite enjoy cow. I like steak a lot. I eat it whenever I can. Actually, I eat it all the time. Isn't that funny Lawyer?Thunder Lawyer: There is a gun over there. I can get it and shoot myself in the head. Then I will be out of this misery. Thunder Train: Pizzeria? I don't think they have any around here. I'm not here to talk about food anyway surprisingly. I'm here to check up on you man, to see how you are doing.Train slaps the head of Lawyer. Shockwaves of pain flow through his body. Lawyer just sits there and knows he can't do anything.Thunder Lawyer: OW OW OW OW OW! Thunder Train: I also come with good news and bad news! The good news is, me and Mainer are buddies now...again...I don't know but we don't hate each other anymore, isn't that great?Thunder Lawyer: Are you kidding me? That crazy son of a bitch breaks my neck and puts me in a hospital and this idiot just goes and forgives him? I bet they sang something stupid like Journey and Don't Stop Believing to solidify their new found bromance. Speaking of bromance I wonder how Jake Steele is doing. The prick... Thunder Train: I'm really glad we are friends now. Well maybe not friends. Like I said, I have no idea.Thunder Lawyer: Seriously...I have to get that gun. Thunder Train: The bad news is, I'm involved with more shit between Gingerdude and Thunderkiss. It's sorta ironic that Jake is fighting Thunderkiss for the world title and I'm fighting Dave Shadow for the International Title. Personally, I don't even care about the belt anymore, I just want my sister back.Thunder Lawyer: Sister? Wasn't that shit three month ruled. Thunder Train: I think the only way I'll be able to do it is to blow through Shadow and get to Gingerdude and kick his ass until he tells me what's up. Hopefully by that time you will be able to walk again.Thunder Lawyer: Just you wait Train. When I get back up I'll be harder...better...faster...stronger.... Thunder Train: I mean, you showed some pretty sick moves out there in that match. Who knows, you may become the Entertainment champion!Thunder Lawyer: Work it harder, make it better, do it faster, makes us stronger. God that is a catchy song. Thunder Train: Wouldn't that be sick! Then we would have all the belts like we should have. We would control the place! That would be great, wouldn't it be great.Train starts shaking Lawyer around.Thunder Lawyer: OW OW OW! JUST WHEN I BLOCK HIM OUT. Train sets him down.Thunder Train: Well, I'm gonna head out now. It was good seeing you man. I'll catch ya later.Thunder Lawyer: Oh thank God he's gone. Train gets up and begins to leave the hospital. He gives a friendly smile back to Thunder Lawyer who stares at him with evil eyes. Lawyer then sees that his food cart is coming. He eyes it sharply, he hasn't eaten for a while. However, Train catches a whiff of it.Thunder Lawyer: No..... Thunder Train: I SMELL FOOD!Thunder Lawyer: NO NO NO Thunder Train: Where is it? WHERE IS IT? THERE IT IS!Thunder Lawyer: FFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU Train eats all of the food on the cart, shocking the nurse and everyone around him. He finishes then eats the cart as well. Thunder Lawyer looks back with a expression. Empty stomached, he now lays there once more...
End.
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Post by Jonny Spade on May 28, 2009 19:51:53 GMT -5
Segment: Divination resumes (Credit: Hitman)
Later on in the day, after having met a rather Colossus of a man, Alexandra has arrived at the temple of Hitman, so to say. She calmly walks up the front steps and is now at the front door, ready to dine with the man she met today. Alexandra knocks on the door and hears a voice beckoning her to come in. She complies and opens the door, finding no one inside at the moment. Alexandra glances around.
Alexandra: Êáëùóüñéóåò; ¼ðïéïò áñ÷éêÞ; {Hello? Anyone home?}
Alexandra continues to pace around until she makes her way into the living room, where she sees...
Hitman: åðßñ. {Indeed.}
Alexandra has a now bemused look on her face, seeing Hitman garbed in the clothes he wore today and a bath robe. A pipe rests in his mouth as he takes a puff. Hitman then smirks and quickly casts it aside before removing his robe to reveal the clothes he wore earlier in the day.
Hitman: haha, æçôþ óõãíþìç. É ðáñáôçñÞóåé Þèåëå ðÜíôá íá ôï êÜíïõìå áõôü. ¸ôóé ðéóôåýù Ý÷åôå êáôáíïÞóåé åäþ åíôÜîåé; {Haha, my apologies. I've always wanted to do that. So I trust that you got here okay?}
Alexandra: Íáé. üëá ðÞãáí ïìáëÜ. ¸ôóé èá åßìáóôå ôñþíå; {Yes. Everything went smoothly. So shall we dine?}
Hitman: Íáé, èá Þôáí ïýôå óßãïõñç åÜí Þóáóôáí Ýíá ÷ïñôïöáãéêÞ Þ ü÷é. ¸ôóé åßìáé äéáôåèåéìÝíç ïñéóìÝíåò óáëÜôá êáé êáßãåôáé ðáôÜôåò. ¸÷ù ïñéóìÝíåò êáßãåôáé áìíïý åÜí åóåßò èá ðñïôéìïýí. {Yes, I wasn't quite sure if you were a vegetarian or not. So I prepared some salad and roast potatoes. I have some roast lamb if you'd prefer.}
Alexandra: ÅÜí ôï êñÝáò äåí åßíáé ÔñïöÝò ãéá óêýëïõò Þ ãÜôåò, èá áðïëáýïõí. {If the meat is not a dog or a cat, I will enjoy it.}
Hitman: ... èá Þèåëá åßìáé áñ÷ßæïõí íá üðùò êáé åóåßò Þäç. {...I'm starting to like you already.}
Alexandra laughs and playfully bats Hitman on the arm as Hitman simply smiles at her. The two soon dish up their meal and begin to feast. During the course of their meal, the two discuss the life of Athens and its noted longevity, having been inhabited for about 4,500 years now. Soon after the two finish their cuisine, Hitman guides Alexandra over to the couch where the two sit down to discuss other things.
Hitman: Ôé áêñéâþò åßíáé ôï Ýñãï óáò; Äåí åß÷á ðïôÝ äåí Ý÷ïõìå ôçí åõêáéñßá íá óáò ñùôÞóù. {So what exactly is your job? I never did get a chance to ask you.}
Alexandra has a look of small disappointment on her face as she speaks.
Alexandra: Åßìáé áðáó÷ïëåßôáé óå ìéá êáôÜñôéóç ìïíôÝëùí ïñãáíéóìïý. Ãéá ôï ìåãáëýôåñï ìÝñïò, üìùò, ç âáñåôü êáé äåí åßíáé ç óôáäéïäñïìßá äñüìï èá Þèåëá íá ëçöèïýí. {I'm employed at a modeling agency. For the most part though, it's pretty boring and it's not the career path I wanted to take.}
Hitman looks at her, pensively.
Hitman: Åðßóçò, ôé èÝëåôå íá êÜíåôå; {Well, what would you like to do?}
Alexandra: Åðßóçò, ãéá íá åßìáé åéëéêñéíÞò, åãþ èá áãÜðç ðñïò Ýíá ðñüôõðï åãþ. ¸÷ù êïõñáóôåß ôçò áíôéìåôþðéóçò óÜêùí ôùí ïóôþí ìïõ ëÝåé üôé èá ðáñáôçñÞóåé Ý÷ïõí ëÜâåé ôá "ëÜèïò ÷Üðéá ãéá ôç äéáôñïöÞ". ÈÝëù íá ôï äéêü ìïõ õðüäåéãìá 7 ìïíáäéêÞ, äéáöïñåôéêÞ åéêüíá. Ãíùñßæåôå ôé åííïþ; {Well, to be honest, I'd love to be a model myself. I'm tired of dealing with sacks of bones telling me that they've been taking the "wrong pills for their diet". I want to be my own model; unique, a different look. You know what I mean?}
A few small seconds pass as Alexandra looks around, almost gazing off into space as she dreams about a future she wishes she had. Hitman interrupts her by placing a giant hand on her shoulder.
Hitman: ÁëåîÜíäñá, åßìáé ðñüêåéôáé íá åßíáé åéëéêñéíåßò. Åãþ èá áãÜðç, ãéá íá óáò ðÜñïõìå ìáæß ìïõ óôçí åôáéñåßá óáò åñãáóßá. {Alexandra, I'm going to be honest. I'd love to take you with me to the company I work for.}
Alexandra draws back in surprise.
Alexandra: ÐñáãìáôéêÜ; Ãéá ðïéïí ëüãï; {Really? What for?}
Hitman: Ôï BOSS Ý÷åé ìéá ìåãÜëç åðéññïÞ. üôé ðñÝðåé, ï ïðïßïò åêìåôáëëåýåôáé ìéá áðü ôéò ìåãáëýôåñåò ðÜëçò åôáéñåßåò óôïí êüóìï óÞìåñá. Ìðïñþ íá óáò õðïâÜëù óå áõôüí êáé íá äïýìå áí èá óáò ðáñÝ÷åé Ýãêñéóç. Åííïþ ... ÊïéôÜîôå óáò ... {My boss has a lot of influence. He should, he runs one of the biggest wrestling companies in the world today. I can present you to him and see if he gives you approval. I mean... Look at you...}
Hitman then brings his other hand up and uses it to stroke Alexandra's hair. Her eyes begin to shimmer as she looks directly into Hitman's.
Hitman: Åóåßò öôÜóåé üìïñöåò. {You're beautiful.}
The two say nothing for a short while. All they do is lean in. Finally, their lips connect with each other's and the spark that sets off the passion is ignited. From the temple of Poseidon all the way back to the ACW arena itself, nothing can stop these two from signifying their newfound love for each other. Once they release, Hitman and Alexandra smile at each other before she inclines her head towards his chest.
Alexandra: Åãþ èá áãÜðç íá Ýñèïõí ìáæß óáò. {I'd love to come with you.}
Hitman nods with a big grin on his face. Just then, a small yawn is heard. Hitman looks down and finds Alexandra exhausted from the meal the two engaged in. Hitman allows her to comfortably rest in his lap and he leans his head back, closing his eyes and allowing sleep to overcome him. As he closes his eyes, he smiles. Alexandra is a suitable replacement for Serenity, indeed.
Fade.
(OOC: Most of the symbols don't show up the way they're supposed to in this segment and the previous one. >_> FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF--)
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